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  1. #701

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    Jul 2011
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    Serena
    Its funny how everything you said is EXACTLY the way I feel. I have said so many times that people that don't abuse pills have bad days too. You just can't hide from a bad day can you? Also I too have had a lifestyle change in many ways. Jesus is first in my life, although the self gets in the way. The goal of my husband and myself is to help those in need. We have always done that but we decided to step it up. That's better than any drug. Jesus is better than any drug. I can see that it seems we are the only two left here and that worries me. I don't know if they are that free from it or they relapsed. I just don't want this to shut down. CONGRATULATIONS on your 90 days. YAAAAA. I Feel so sad because I feel like im loosing so many friends. I think we still need each others support. I just know a couple of years ago I got comfortable and strong feeling and I relapsed. This time I had friends here that pushed me on and I still need pushing. I learned so much on this site about myself. You have a great day and you celebrate your 90 days. You know I lost count. I know it was the last day of july. Omg! Has it been over 90? I feel like its been a month. It must be harder when you have relapsed before. I do not feel comfortable yet.

  2. #702
    serena's Avatar
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    @ Counting days...I don't honestly feel comfortable myself. Not one hundred percent. I still find myself thinking about the pills often and I can't wait until I'm free from those thoughts. I have figured out one thing about my addiction...it's a choice. It's definitely my decision if I stay sober or decide to feed my addiction. One thing I have learned is that if a person doesn't WANT to stop, they won't. You have to WANT it and that is what's saving me right now. I want this sooooo bad. I love the feeling of being lifted from that fog I was living in and don't want to go back.

    It does seem like we are the only two here doesn't it? I look at the page and see my avatar and thing, dang...you sure are talking alot Serena! lol

    And yes!! It has been over 90 days for you if it was the end of July!! YAY!!!!!!! I'm soooo proud of you!! We are right there together, my last day was August 13th...maybe that's why we can relate so well...we are kinda at the same stage in this! I do wish the best for those that have been here with us in the journey and I hope that someone out there reading decides to make this their day 1!! I'm not going anywhere, even if I talk to myself!! I know that someone is reading because I was that person once and for several weeks, this forum gave me desire to start my journey. We can do this...together!!
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  3. #703
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    Hello everyone! I know that nobody is posting right now, but I know your reading. I encourage you to post here if you are, there are many out there that need to know they are not alone and it helps to see that there are other people going through the same thing. This forum has been like a family to many, I encourage you to share your stories. If you have previously posted here and relapsed, don't feel guilty or embarrassed to post again...it's ok, this is a place that you will not be judged. We are all just like you and have been through the exact same thing....we understand!!

    @Countingdays...Hey there!! Just wanted to make sure your doing well? Did you have a nice weekend? Not working too hard are you??

    Hope you all have a wonderful Monday! I'm trying to get motivated...not moving too well this morning and definitely not motivated after a long weekend! Thanksgiving holiday, hurry up!!!
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  4. #704
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    Good morning! I'm checking in on everyone today. It makes me sad to see that nobody is posting here anymore. I don't know if that's a good sign or a bad sign. I'm praying for the positive.

    Thought I would post a link to one of this sites wonderful articles that has helped me and is REALLY REALLY good...if you have a minute take time to read it:

    http://www.spiritualriver.com/101-he...ean-and-sober/

    I hope that you all are doing well and staying clean and sober. Please let us know how things are going. Thinking about you all!

    @Counting days....where are you girlie?? Working hard huh?
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  5. #705

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    Nov 2011
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    1
    I am tapering off of Hydros and I am all kinds of crazy feelings. I have had panic attacks and my chest feels like it hurts. I was taking 4 to 5 a day 10mg and went to 1 and a half. What can I do to make this feeling go away?

  6. #706
    serena's Avatar
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    @ Heatherclark...Congratulations on making the choice to stop taking your hydro's! I know it seems like the hardest thing ever, but once you are through it, you will feel sooooo much better!! Did you go from 4 to 5 a day to 1 1/2 all of the sudden or did you slowly taper down? Unfortunately panic attacks are part of the withdrawal process in most people. You will experience irritability, stomach issues, insomnia, restless legs, muscle aches, flu like symtoms and yes, anxiety. Symptoms vary from person to person, but the physical part usually last anywhere from 3 - 5 days. Once you get past those, it becomes more of a psychological battle. The good part...you can get through this! Just make sure you get plenty of rest, stay hydrated and try to get as much sleep as possible for the first several days. When your awake, stay as active as you can tolerate to keep your mind busy because you will have cravings and you need to definitely try to keep your mind occupied on something other than the pills. I don't know why, but long hot baths helped me so much! I think I took at least 10 hot baths a day on the first week. It relaxed me and soothed my sore body. It was a release. You just have to find something that eases your mind and your soul. Everyone is different and everyone find comfort in their own way. I hope that you have a strong support system with friends and family or your doctor, counselor or church family. It really helps to talk about it. That's what I used this forum for as well. Everytime I felt weak...I came here and posted. Even if I was just putting my feelings down in writing, it helped. I encourage you to do the same. There hasn't been many posting here lately, but the few that are here will support you one hundred percent. I'm so glad that you are making this step forward. I wish you luck and I will be checking on you everyday. Take it one day at a time and you can do this!!
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  7. #707
    serena's Avatar
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    May 2011
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    @Countingdays...Come out, come out wherever you are!!!
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  8. #708

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    Jul 2011
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    Serena
    hey friend. Im sorry I have not been here in a week. I have had strep throat for the first time and i didnt even feel like living.lol. I am much better now and going back to work on this chilly sat. morning. My doc put me on a new med that i took only a couple of times for pain. Let me tell you I was scared. Its called Nucynta. Ever heard of it? I dont trust these drug companys. I know one thing. Hydros would not have touched this kind of pain anyway, thats what he said. How are you doing? I got the friend request but im afraid I didnt do it right. Im a computer dummy. Let me know if it worked and how it works. There are some things that I dont want to put out here. I hope its a private thing. Love Ya my friend and God bless you.

  9. #709

    Join Date
    Apr 2011
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    Hey everyone. I'm back. I had a major relapse after my fishing trip this summer. I checked in to a 30 day inpatient progaram on sept. 3rd. I really enjoyed the program. I put me on subxen to detox and I didn't have any symtoms. I have been drug and alcohol free for 80 days today. Woo Hoo! I highly recommend inpaient services for anyone struggling with these nasty hydro's. Or at least a suboxen detox in one. Wish you all well!!!!!!

  10. #710
    Quote Originally Posted by CJB View Post
    Hey everyone. I'm back. I had a major relapse after my fishing trip this summer. I checked in to a 30 day inpatient progaram on sept. 3rd. I really enjoyed the program. I put me on subxen to detox and I didn't have any symtoms. I have been drug and alcohol free for 80 days today. Woo Hoo! I highly recommend inpaient services for anyone struggling with these nasty hydro's. Or at least a suboxen detox in one. Wish you all well!!!!!!
    That's awesome CJB so glad you are back and doing well. I too have relapsed a few times in the past several months and it gets worse each time. I stayed away from this site because I felt like such a failure giving advice and encouragement and not being able to stay clean myself. I just happened to get on this site yesterday and saw your post and was thrilled to see you back I am once again trying to get off this crap, this is day 4 this time and I'm not feeling too bad now but I am so affraid of relapsing down the road. I am thinking about checking out a outpatient recovery program to see if they can help me with long term recovery, I just cannot keep doing this to myself and my family and I don't trust myself to do it on my own anymore.

  11. #711

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    Apr 2011
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    Quote Originally Posted by T is back View Post
    That's awesome CJB so glad you are back and doing well. I too have relapsed a few times in the past several months and it gets worse each time. I stayed away from this site because I felt like such a failure giving advice and encouragement and not being able to stay clean myself. I just happened to get on this site yesterday and saw your post and was thrilled to see you back I am once again trying to get off this crap, this is day 4 this time and I'm not feeling too bad now but I am so affraid of relapsing down the road. I am thinking about checking out a outpatient recovery program to see if they can help me with long term recovery, I just cannot keep doing this to myself and my family and I don't trust myself to do it on my own anymore.
    Hi T, I'm am sorry to here that you are still struggling. I too was on here giving advice and encouragement when I was in relapse. I also started feeling like a hypocrit. I pray you make it through this time. If not, I strongly recommend an inpaitent detox at least an if you can manage a 28 day inpaitient program. Being there feels so safe and after 28 days of clean time and education it will be easier to stay clean. In any case, You will be in my prayers. Keep in touch

  12. #712
    serena's Avatar
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    May 2011
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    @ Dragonfly...Hey honey!! Spreading a little sunshine your way!! Hope your doing well!!

    @ Counting Days....I hope you feel better! Strep throat makes you feel yucky!! I've never heard of Nucynta. How are you doing on those?

    @ T is Back...Glad to see you on the forum!! I truly hope that this time is YOUR time to get through this! If you aren't able to do it by yourself, then I too believe that you should check out a recovery center for yourself. Even though I have been clean for over 90 days I still think at times that I could benefit from the help of others in a group setting. Because there are days I feel weak and I guess I need to "management" skills to help to prevent me from relapsing. So I totally understand!! In the long term, only you know what is best for you, but know that I am here supporting you and you are always in my thoughts and prayers.

    @ CJB...Hello!! I've seen your name on the forum, it's nice to finally speak with you! So glad things are going well for you right now! Congratulations on your sobriety!!

    Please guys, continue to post even if you are/have relasped. It still helps to hear your words and relate to your experiences and maybe this is a little selfish on my part, but just to know that your ok makes me feel better. Please don't be ashamed of relasping, this addiction is so hard to battle and the recovery process can be a rough up and down process for us. I'm glad to see you all here and I'm glad everyone is doing well. I'm thinking about you all and will be praying for you all everyday! Hope everyone is planning a great Thanksgiving!! Luv u guys!!
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  13. #713
    Thanks for all your support everyone. I'm doing okay (day 6). Absolutely no energy today but that's okay I can relax today. Just taking it one day at a time. The first couple of days I had no choice but to keep busy and I think it helped me. I couldn't sleep for a few nights because of the tension in my legs but am sleeping better now. I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and I will talk to you soon

  14. #714
    Good morning everyone!

    Everyone must be busy, this site has been kinda lonely lately. I really hope everyone is doing well.

    I'm starting day 11 today and just taking it one day at a time. Still not alot of energy but I am going to give this everything I've got to get through it. I am being optimistic but guarded at the same time.

    T

  15. #715
    serena's Avatar
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    May 2011
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    Hey T! The site has been rather slow lately huh? Congrats on day 11!!!! You sound extremely determined...I'm very proud of you!!

    Counting days...where are you girlie?? Hoping your working, working and working some more!

    Hope everyone is having a great week and doing well.
    Serena

    "When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top"

  16. #716

    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    IL
    Posts
    110
    I am proud of you too, T. Hang in there. Sobriety is worth more than gold. You can make it. Have you ever tried NA or AA. I find them to be very helpful. It's nice to talk to other addicts in person. Just a thought. I am praying for you T. God Bless

  17. #717
    Day 13 and still hanging in there. Thank you CJB and Serena for your encouraging words

  18. #718
    I just realized my last post two weeks ago was on the wrong forum, lol anyway, again I haven't been on here for about 2 -3 weeks. I finally mustered up the courage to talk to my sister (who is a Dr. Btw).. HUGE mistake, she yelled at me and we haven't talked since, I was simply asking her about Suboxone or however you spell it. All she had tomsaynwas thatnshe want prescribing me anything, which I wasn't asking her to.. I just wanted some medical advise, unfotunatelty I asked her 10 days before Thanksgiving, she took it upon herself to tell me entire family who acted like they knew nothing but there were all sorts of comments about ppl overdosing on pain pills and what it does to their family and children. So I haven't talked to anyone of them since.. My Thanksgiving was horrible and then I basically hid in my house tl my sisters left on Sunday night. I don't know what else to do, I wanted to bad to be clean for the holidays and theonly thing tha was accomplished was that now feel isolated. My sons birthday is on Monday and although my other sister came by before she left to give him a present I won't be having my regular family party for my son at my moms because it would just be to awkward. So now I'm just isolated from everyone. Life sucks! That's what's going on with me..
    CBJ: so amazing that you are clean!! Myself and everyone else here is so proud of you, I just know it.. Keep up with your journey and you'll become unstoppable!
    T and serena I miss you guys!! *hugs*
    I'll try to post more positive stuff next time, I've just so fed up with everything I haven't been myself.. Actually I'm not even quite sure who I am anymore!

  19. #719

    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Location
    USA
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    1,114
    Counting days and Serena, come back to exercise challenge. I am suffering though a doozy of a cold right mow but plan to get back to it as soon as I feel able, which I hope will be Monday at latest..

  20. #720
    Day 18 and still plugging away day by day.

    I'm feeling a bit better now and hoping to continue feeling better each day. I've realized there is nothing so important that needs to be done that I have to be drugged up to do. Taking life easy right now and just trying to get well. It would be so easy to go pick up some pills and get through each day but that just can't go on forever so there comes a time in life where we just have to say enough is enough. Not saying I will never relapse but for now I am enjoying my freedom again. I truly hope you are all doing well, I get concerned when people stop posting, been there done that! Just wanted to post and let everyone know I'm still plugging away one day at a time

    T

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