Welcome, miim619! You are in a good place, but you know that already. You sound ready.
Welcome, miim619! You are in a good place, but you know that already. You sound ready.
Welcome miim. You can do this! :-)
Morgan
“If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.” ~ William Arthur Ward
HI miim619, welcome and a huge congratulations on your day 1. You did something hard by admitting that you have a problem and it is the all important first step. There is no single way or path to sobriety and you will find lots of great advice here from a wide variety of people that are dealing with the same things you are. There is a great deal of collective wisdom in these forums, so try to make some time to read through this thread, the How to Stop Drinking thread, and definitely the articles at the main site.
Instead of beating yourself up, try instead to find the strength to forgive yourself and start leaving the old you and the mistakes of your past behind. I believe you that some higher power must have brought you here, so keep posting, let us know how your progress is going, introduce yourself in that other thread and any other ones that speak to you, and best of luck to you!
Woke up (though didn't sleep much as I am used to wine assisting me in getting to sleep) not feeling rested and had some mean nightmares it seemed right as I would start to fall asleep something would jerk me awake. But none the less, 1 day under my belt. Feels good not waking up hungover and being able to almost (still feeling uncomfortable in my own skin, in a haze) fully be there for the morning routine taking my kids to school.
I took some benadryl to try and help me sleep but it didn't much. I miss natural sleep, cannot remember the last time I had it though.
But I'm here, reading a lot, forum and books too. I've been missing a higher power in my life, I am just beginning to open up to that idea, that I most definitely NEED the help and faith in one.
Off I go to work.
Have a good day everyone.
Thank you for the support.
I can relate to the poor sleep and nightmares miim619. My sleep is still poor but I am thankful for Netflix! :-)
You will feel better and better each day and hopefully that will reinforce your commitment to sobriety.
Congratulations on Day 1.
Morgan
“If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it.” ~ William Arthur Ward
So, it's wine for you too? Hopefully tonight will be better.
Wine is my problem. I go through cycles where I drink it every night, wake up feeling terrible and just go through the motions of the day. I don't drink bottles of the stuff at a time, but enough to rob me of the next day. Every morning I say "not tonight" but then after work I find myself at the liquor store, bottle in hand. I tend to drink when I am alone during the week, rather than on the weekends. Right now, it is an after work-late night thing for me...my "me time" (poor excuse). I know to some of you may think this seem "light" compared to many of the other posts but to me it's a huge problem. The more often I drink, the more I slip away inside myself. I become less social, less concerned with real life. A few years back I really slipped, I wasn't a very attentive wife or mother and I made some very big mistakes. I promised myself I wouldn't do it again but I feel it starting to happen. The signs are there...the drinking, becoming despondent, disconnected. That is why I am here. I want to keep my promise and stop before I cycle back and find myself, once again, in that horrible place.
I guess the test tonight will be if I have the guts to pour the rest of my wine down the drain and not my throat.
"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." ~Albert Einstein
Welcome to the forum miim619 and SunLilly. Congratulations to you both for deciding to do something about your drinking. I think you will find the Spiritual River forum a great place of support and guidance. There are people here who know what you are going through and they are very caring, understanding and non-judgmental. There is lots of great advice over on the 'How to stop drinking' thread. I encourage you to read through the posts there and post your own thoughts as well. I was thinking yesterday of one of the great pieces of advice about being sober and it really helped me through a rough day. It is along the lines of 'there is no problem in life that can't be made worse by drinking'! So, hang in there be kind you yourself. You can do it. Best wishes. Jeff
miim619, I make no secret of the fact that my faith in God is one of the major contributing factors to helping me along this journey and am here to encourage you to seek your own Higher Power. As with sobriety, there are multiple paths to attain that faith you are referring to. May I suggest that it starts with having faith that we are all interconnected spiritually as humans by something that is greater than ourselves. If you feel that pull inside of you, then I would encourage you to explore it further and find out what it means to you. For me, it was a God shaped hole that only He could fill. What an exciting journey you are about to embark on! Good luck and let me know how it goes.
It may take you a few days until you are able to sleep normally or maybe even a few weeks, but when you have your first night's sleep and wake up sober, feeling refreshed for the first time in a long time, you will feel like a new person and realize what you have been missing! Stick with it and you will see, hopefully very soon! Ken
Sunlilly, I did that too, retreated into my own little world, drinking until the pain stopped. The problem is that the pain came back everyday until I dealt with the problems causing it. Congratulations on discovering that there must be a better way! Keep your promise to yourself, keep posting and let us know how you are doing. Jeff nailed it, keep reading through the thread here and definitely introduce yourself in the How To Stop Drinking thread. Read through the articles at the main site, read through all the threads here that appeal to you and post, post, post. My old friend Billy calls it "keyboard therapy" and man is he right! It really helps when you are surfing an urge to come here and vent to all the new friends you are about to meet. Best of luck to you and see you around! Ken
The Ant Philosophy by Jim Rohn
Over the years, I've been teaching kids about a simple but powerful concept: the Ant Philosophy. I think everybody should study ants. They have an amazing four-part philosophy.
Here is the first part: Ants never quit. That's a good philosophy. If they're headed somewhere and you try to stop them, they'll look for another way. They'll climb over. They'll climb under. They'll climb around. They keep looking for another way. What a neat philosophy-to never quit looking for a way to get where you're supposed to go.
Second, ants think winter all summer. That's an important perspective. You can't be so naive as to think summer will last forever. So ants gather their winter food in the middle of summer.
An ancient story says, "Don't build your house on the sand in the summer." Why do we need that advice? Because it is important to think ahead. In the summer, you've got to think storm. You've got to think rocks as you enjoy the sand and sun.
The third part of the Ant Philosophy is that ants think summer all winter. That is so important. During the winter, ants remind themselves, "This won't last long; we'll soon be out of here." And the first warm day, the ants are out. If it turns cold again, they'll dive back down, but then they come out the first warm day. They can't wait to get out.
And here's the last part of the ant philosophy. How much will an ant gather during the summer to prepare for the winter? All he possibly can. What an incredible philosophy, the "all-you-possibly-can" philosophy.
Wow, what a great philosophy to have-the ant philosophy. Never give up, look ahead, stay positive and do all you can.
Hi, im new here and have had little success over the years trying to become sober. I keep repeating these negative patterns over and over. i just recently got back into church..i look foward to a new life with christ.
Welcome Miim, SunLily, Edwin and anyone else I missed.
SunLily- I could totally have written your post 9 months ago! Word for word! It is a trap when we notice that others are worse than we are, that we aren't that bad, etc... I think it is great that you are recognizing your problem now, and not 5 or 10 or 30 years from now! The bad sleep gets better (sleep disturbances and nightmares are text-book reactions to stopping alcohol). My advice is to stay hydrated, and write down why you want to leave alcohol behind, so that when you forget you can look at it and remember.
What I am amazed at is that if you make the decision, you can do it. I shared it with my husband and my kids, so I couldn't pretend, and make that early morning deal with myself, that today I won't drink, only to find myself with a glass in hand come four o'clock.
I also feel compelled to mention, something that drove me away from AA was the higher power thing. I respect those of you who have that feeling, but the kind of thinking that says you can't get better unless you have a higher power was not true for me. I did it with the help of people like you, pure and simple, and with my own hard-headed stubbornness!
Thank you all for such a warm welcome. It was not easy to post yesterday. I know it is an anonymous site, but I still felt very self-conscious and vulnerable. And as silly as it may sound, I was a little nervous that no one would respond to my post. I do appreciate all the encouragement.
I made it through last night. I didn't drink the wine, but I didn't pour it out either. Tonight I have been drinking tea, a whole lot of tea. I am about to go to bed. I am absolutely exhausted.
"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." ~Albert Einstein
Ruth,
Great advice to write down early on the reasons for quitting drinking. As time goes on it's likely that the alcoholic voice will tell us we are FINE and try convince us we can drink again without problems.
We ended up here seeking a solution because we know we have a drinking problem. The only solution is a zero tolerance policy and a 100% commitment to sobriety.
Admitting to yourself and writing down your personal dark encounters with drinking is ammunition that can help you later on. Admitting it to someone who cares about you is another big, important step in keeping you accountable.
Best wishes to those starting out! I was there recently and I am building a new normal at age 56.
Edwin, welcome, glad you decided to join us here on this journey and make some positive changes for yourself. You took the all important first step in recognizing that you have a problem, pat yourself on the back and celebrate every small victory! Next read through the posts here in this thread and in the How To Stop Drinking thread, also introduce yourself over there as it is the main thread. There are a lot of great people here and a lot of collective wisdom posted in these pages, so come back often. Read through the articles by Patrick at the main site and please come here and post as often as you like, it is one of those things that can help when the urge to drink comes knocking. Best of luck and look forward to seeing you around!
Day 2 for me
Day 2...reading "if you think you have a problem, you probably do" stuck with me when reading these posts. It's that whisper.... I don't want to wait until that whisper turns into shouts. If alcohol were not an issue for me, I doubt it would seem like such a big deal to stop.
Hi HSN. Welcome to the forum and congratulations on day 2. This is a great place to receive and give help to yourself and others who are trying to come to grips with alcohol. There’s lots of great information here, as well as people who are caring, helpful, understanding and non-judgmental. Good on you for taking the courageous step to get your life back from alcohol.
I read your post over on the First Day thread and you asked if you are an alcoholic. There are many different definitions about what constitutes an alcoholic, but I prefer not to use such labels. Labels can be problematic as people can tend to ‘live up to their labels’. That said, I’d say the issue is more to do with whether alcohol is causing problems or concerns in your life? If you are having those thoughts now that alcohol is a problem, then I’d say it is a wise thing to do something about it. As you said “If alcohol were not an issue for me, I doubt it would seem like such a big deal to stop.”.
I recommend you join in over on the main How to Stop Drinking forum. Feel free to read and post on that thread as there is heaps of great information posted from people who understand, are willing to help and are interested in how you are doing. Best wishes.
Day 3 I want to feel good about myself again and make myself proud
I fell. I got back up. Saying goodnight to my Day 2 and my first AA meeting attended today.
Goodnight all
Miim
Me too. I made it 4 days, then fell. It is now day 4 again. Feeling OK today, but I always feel strong until about 6pm then I really start to crave it.
Miim-Gald you got back up too. Wishing you the best.
"A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." ~Albert Einstein
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