My Addict Husband has disappeared.
First off, during the 3 years my husband and I have been married he has spent most of it in and out of rehab. About 8 months ago, he had the option of either leaving our home or finding another rehab to go to. We do not have insurance, so he decided to enter into a free mission type religious based rehab over a hundred miles away. For 7 months, he did very well. He has been in 3 of these type rehabs before, and says he does better with these. Anyway, the program lasts a year. We got to see eachother on a regular basis, a few times a month. He seemed to be doing great until he was allowed to start working again. That's when it always falls apart. He never had any money even though he was working, always saying he was saving. I bought this because of the boundaries I set forth for him were as follows: Save money for an apt in the new city he was living for us to start over, I wanted a new wedding ring since he pawned mine on more than one occasion and it was finally lost to me forever, buy himself a car, pay deposits for utilities and such, etc. Most of these dealt with money because he has never been responsible with it. I also required he finish his year commitment. He agreed to all these, seemed thankful. So anyway, fast forward, two weeks ago I was losing my mind, he had stopped calling me (used to at least 3 times a day) and was turning his phone off at night. Finally, it all came out, he left the rehab back at the beginning of May, and had been lying to me for a month. I've tried everything, he refuses to answer my calls. Now his cell phone is off, and he calls about once a week from a blocked number asking for money, at first he was claiming he wanted to come home then it goes into begging and demanding money. He is so cold to me. Nothing like my husband. He is in a very large city, and I have no idea where he is or who's he with. He was fired from his job, but I know that he isn't homeless, yet anyway. I'm at a complete loss. I'm so hurt by his actions. I know he's in the throws of his addiction, and it isn't him. But I don't know how much I can take. I love him, I believe he loves me, but how can he do this? I haven't sent him any money, I refuse, I've offered to come and get him, and he says he will call and let me know where to pick him up and I never hear from him. I'm terrified for his safety, and I'm afraid that maybe he's with another woman. Everything has gone through my mind. I need advice, or at least some experience. Thank you.