How to stop drinking

[serenty]

Wow so many great posts! Today is really tough so I thought I'd come here and I am so glad I did. It amazes me that I can be so double minded. I enjoy the peace and freedom more though just like Sue so eloquently listed ;-)

[Christy]

Kimber-I usually have only 4 half gallons of ice cream in the freezer and it's just the two of us. Can't say it's normal, but better than 4 gallons of wine for me. Lol!

[serenty]

Kimber I am laughing because my freezer is full of ice crem too! I did not eat it when drinking ( got my sugar from alcohol) but it helps keep me sober so what can I say? I agree with Christy it is better than a fridge full of al
cohol ( and I live alone too)

[Tere]

I have not been posting much, but have been reading others posts. I have gone way back when this site has started and everything everyone shares is spectacular! Kudos

[serenty]

Hi Tere! Great to here from you

[freedom71612]

Great posts. Very inspirational. Not a great day for me felt pretty horrible, to the point where I wondered if maybe I just had a bug. Good night all. The next week will be a challenge as we will be having guests for a week and some are heavy drinkers. I must stay strong and will sneak away during the day and night to read all of the inspiration and struggles on the forum.

[janny]

John thankyou for that explanation about the endorphins and the feeling when you first start drinking.I had gotten to the point that the good feeling from alcohol was short lived for me and almost immmediately started talking to myself about the need to stop.I'm so glad I found this forum it's kept me focused and given me a place to touch base with my feelings and supports the decision I made by listening to your successful stories of sobriety and the dissappointment of slipping up, it keeps me strong.
One thing that has helped me too is I am working on taking "massive action" in my life. Been working on my hobbies and things i like to do, including being a little selfish so i don't get too hungry, tired or bored.Good luck today everyone I love the way I'm feeling so clear headed, yesterday i did take a long nap and gave myself permission to do so.I feel that is my body slowly healing itself.Stay Strong.I feel like I'm becoming a better role model for my kids too.

[wlinser]

Good Morning! Thirty days today. A friend asked if I was going to get a chip. I said politefully, 'No.' I'm doing this for myself - not for something material. So far, I've done it w/o attending AA. Hope I'm making the right choice - self-control and rational thinking. Time will tell, eh? Have a brilliant Friday and weekend.
“We are all of us richer than we think we are; but we are taught to borrow and to beg . . . (and yet) we need little doctrine to live at our ease; and Socrates teaches us, that this is in us, and the way to find it, and how to use it.” -Michel de Montaigne

[Tere]

With this in mind, it is essential that an addict prepare himself for almost 3 months of initial recuperation. It's precisely when the addict feels that his system is stabilizing that he is in the gravest danger. This usually occurs at about 45 days clean. It is then when the addict must begin to resolve underlying emotional and social conflicts. For an addict: stress causes craving! To become free of addiction, an addict must resolve the conflicts in his life! He can do this by accepting responsibility for his actions, and by facing and resolving his deepest anxieties. He must make amends to himself, to his family, and to society. The only way for an addict to relieve the stresses which cause him to use is to identify the interior and exterior conflicts in his life and resolve them. "You have to name it, to claim it." When conflicts are resolved serenity becomes possible. By achieving new levels of interior serenity, compulsive behaviors can be overcome. It is serenity which enables an addict to be relieved of compulsions. Serenity can only be achieved by the resolution of conflict. Over time, and the resolution of conflicts, addiction becomes manageable.

~I found this paragraph interesting to say the least. Hope it helps Tere

[wlinser]

Tere, thanks for that posting. Today is day 30. A friend told me to collect my chip. I told him, 'No, thanks.' I don't want a chip because I'm doing this for myself - not for something material. Have also done this w/o AA. Using self-control and rational thinking. Hope/pray that it works. I'm feeling better but still have waves of feeling low and depressed. Continue to tell myself when I crave a beer that I have to wait 24 hours. That seems to work. “We are all of us richer than we think we are; but we are taught to borrow and to beg . . . (and yet) we need little doctrine to live at our ease; and Socrates teaches us, that this is in us, and the way to find it, and how to use it.” -Michel de Montaigne

[Midwest Sue]

Tere, Thank you for that information. It makes sense, completely.

[liberte]

51 days. Check. Still on the sober train. Still reading.

[janny]

Day 14 for me. Feels real good.However something I noticed especially after your post Tere. I've been working on the physical part of my recovery but the emotional part has not fully surfaced. i know there are conflicts that are lurking around me and I can acknowledge them but not able to face them yet.There are many things in my past that I have a hard time forgiving myself for but I'm working at it and it's not as hurtful. I would like to be able to forgive people in my past but can't do it until it is sincere,I can't just say it because I'm in recovery unless I mean it ,right? And I don't know how to explain myself for not being there for some people in my past so that's hard to resolve too.I'm feeling I need to be patient and as the days go by these answers will come.
I do know that after 14 days of sobriety I will not go back. I feel so strong.I've missed so much it's like my day would end around 4pm after that first drink.Now it can last until midnight (not quite that late) but you know what I mean.I can even think of going to the late movie at night, play tennis in the evening, maybe even run at night or go grocery shopping. All of a sudden my days are fuller and my mind is thinking and exploring again.Thanks to all for the great quotes,paragraphs and support.Stay strong.

[Sally]

"When you stop chasing the wrong things, you give the right things a chance to catch you."

Saw this quote this morning and thought how true. Have a lovely week - am off to the north country for two weeks. I will carry all of you in my pocket and in my heart. Best wishes on the sober train - don't fall off your bikes while I am gone. LOL

[Tere]

Good afternoon everyone!
Janny, I do know what you are going through because all those thoughts hit me hard 3 years ago when I first gave up alcohol. It didn't hit me until 4 years being sober and I realized on excluding my family all those years. When I relapsed this past year, drinking often and much, I started my old pattern of not contacting my family who supported me tremendously. It has hit me harder and more intensely this time around. I have a family reunion this coming weekend and I would like to discuss my relapse. My family approaches it with tough love and I don't really know if I am ready for that. But I know one thing, I will not be drinking
I also relate to your last paragraph: "I can even think of going to the late movie at night, play tennis in the evening, maybe even run at night or go grocery shopping." Yesterday my friend and I took the dogs to the dog park, then went for a drive and ended up at a nature reserve park that had an overabundance of blackberries that we could pick, so we did. I decided to make jam, dut did not have enough cups of the berries. I had to go to the store and loved walking around after 10 pm on a Saturday night sober in the grocery store. It hit me that this is life and I love it. I love those thoughts that go through my head now. It is bliss!
Everyone have a spectacular day!
Kudos,
Tere

[Beth]

Tomorrow will be 3 months since it finally clicked.
I put on my big girl pants and knew it was time to grow up.
Nothing has been easy but it is so rewarding.
My romance with alcohol is over. Zero Tolerance.
The information and support I have received from this site is amazing and nothing short of a miracle in my life.
I pray everyday for all of you.

[bdog]

so much positive stuff this week. keep it up everyone!!!

[Allyson]

Happy Sunday evening. Tomorrow will be 5 weeks for me. I am so grateful to have reclaimed my long lost sober life. Zero tolerance is working for me- that and being productive and spending time on things I enjoy but which had gotten crowded out by the drinking- reading, knitting, etc. Keep the faith and if you're still struggling just don't quit trying and consider trying a more radical step like getting outside help. So happy to see so many others doing well here and reaping the joys of being sober and content.

[janny]

So nice to see all the positive comments.Last night was a challenge for me the first time at a gathering with family and alcohol. I did not drink,did not want to drink but I was sooo bored just listening to the talk.Ususally I would have a drink and join in the conversation but I felt like a fish out of water. Then I got extremely fatigued and flu like sxs. Even this am I feel sick to my stomach and after 11 hours sleep I'm still exhausted.Not sure if this is normal I'm over the 2 weeks mark of being sober and can't seem to get enough sleep.
Last night I had this conversation with myself while amongst the family and alcohol, Am I going to be able to handle these gatherings with my family when they are drinking?how can I sit there and watch my husband get drunk, everyone else thinks he's funny but I don't.It gets really old fast listening to his jokes when he's drinking,I used to be able to half ignore it when I was drinking but now that I'm sober it's annoying.So when I started to feel fatigue and like a fish out of water that's when I thought maybe if I just have a drink I will feel better? I didn't have one but I felt scared that I may not fit in this scene anymore and what am I going to do about that? This is my husband and family and it's a gathering we do often but I did not enjoy it last night.
Soo I wanted to share this if anyone has had a similar situation and what they have done to overcome this? This feeling of not fitting in some old familiar places is uncomfortable.
I'm so thankful to be able to put this out here. In the past without this forum I think I would have had a drink last night. So thank you to all.

[Midwest Sue]

Janny,
I know how you feel and I'm not sure what advice to give you, but I do think it will get easier to feel ok at these family gatherings over time. It's so great that you made it through this without caving in! I hope that you're able to talk openly with your husband about what you're going through.

Last night my 17 yr old was out with friends. At almost 10 pm he unexpectedly needed a ride home and called me. I can't tell you how good it felt to be free to drive without worry. In the past I would have been illegal at that time of the day.

This sober life is SO worth all of the uncomfortable moments.