Welcome Hope, try to read as much of the forum as you can. We all have the same story. Eat the second you get home. Morgan, way to go with the walks, stay sober today. Day 4 is coming for you and massive action is required. Most importantly, you started over. That is HUGE Alison, I am the master of getting out of any invitation, dont go to work that day. If thats not a good one I can give you many more, lol. I will not drink today
Day 7 ... woo-hoo. Lots to do today, and my 6:30 am workout tomorrow. I've got a last minute work thing that I piled on top of myself as well, just because once I start a new (exciting, fun) project - I can get addicted to that and won't feel the pull to drink. Mike, I love livestrong.com - great website with lots of interesting articles/help.
It helps also that after a week of working out and eating right (I'm on the South Beach diet - modified, I let myself have small amounts of non-gluten carbs and no sugar-sugar because momma needs energy) and NO DRINKING - I am beginning to see results. Pants fit again, no bloat, and without the gluten (or DRINKING) the weird pain in my side has subsided / calmed down. Or maybe the moaning, aching muscles throughout the rest of my bod are just drowning out old muggins.
Take care everyone. Happy Sober Tuesday.
You sound so good Mel,..keep it up! Just think, another couple of months of this and momma will be ready for G-string season!!
Originally Posted by Mel
Stay with it and you will really start feeling the benifits over the next few weeks.
Double digits folks! Starting day 11! I can't believe it... But after I woke up on day 9 without a headache, I knew this was working! Welcome Hope, a lot of us are (were) "scheduled drinkers" once the evening hits. Like Marky Mark said.....Eat and also drink plenty of water. It helps a lot! Morgan I can't remember the last time I have eaten so much. I always thought the cravings at dinner time could only be satisfied with Alcohol. Silly me, food works too! Even with all the food, I lost a pound last week!
Allison, soon the conference/ convention season will begin in my business. Otherwise known as drinking season. I am also thinking about what excuses I will come up with. Lent is my first excuse but it will be over by April. So after looking at excuses on the Internet over the weekend, I found the excuse..."I'm not drinking anymore in honor/ remembrance of (name of person here)". This is a good on for me because I am honoring my Grandfather and Father. My last memory of my Grandfather was him in an alcoholic seizure as my father poured a fifth a gin down his throat. It didn't work he passed away right there in front of us. My father had been sober eight years at this time and even in that tragedy he was able to stay sober. Fast forward to 9 years ago when my father developed lung cancer at age 59 (was able to quit alcohol but not cigarettes). He died within two months of his diagnosis. In those two months he was always saying he just wanted to get on a bike with a bottle of whiskey and ride across the country. I thought he was serious and told him he should do it. But he always said "alcohol was not going to be the death of him". He died with 23 years sobriety.
Sooo besides me saying my age doesn't allow me to recover from alcohol any more, my sobriety is for the two men that showed me so much about life.
Let us know how you doctor appointment goes... That's another for you!
Take care all and stay sober just for today.
Wow. It has been over a month since I have posted on this forum. I am amazed at all the new folks and at the days you all are racking up. Great job. I have been busy over the holidays and, of course, have let myself go. I've been back to old habits of drinking wine every night, eating too much, and not exercising. The good news is that I haven't done anything too embarrassing during this lapse (which is what usually prompts me to swear off alcohol for good), but am just realizing that I need to get refocused on my health and life and getting rid of the alcohol is a good first step. So, day one starts today.
Word of warning to you newbies on here that are starting to get some days under your belt. Don't get cocky and complacent. It is really hard to get back on the wagon after a slip. When I first joined this site, I went 70+ days with no problems, then convinced myself one drink was ok, then slowly went back to old habits. I have tried a couple of times to get back on track since then without success. It is very hard to get back on track if you slip and have that first sip. Just say NO, NO, No...
I am going to take it day by day and figure out what I need to right this time. . I felt so much healthier, happier, with it, and proud of myself, when I was not drinking and WAS exercising 20 minutes everyday. I got to get the 30 day challenge cranked up again, too. Come join me on that thread under water cooler, if you are interested in joining challenge. Rules are simple...at least 20 minutes of exercise every single day for 30 days...no excuses.
I am glad to see some old friends still on here, too. Wow, you all are doing awesome.
Lots to catch up on.
Good morning everybody! I love reading all the positive, encouraging comments. Had a wonderful Bible Study last night ... came home and had NO URGE TO DRINK! Amazing. Jeff, thank you again for your advice. It appears my TMJ symptoms are really just a generalized jaw pain from an abscessed tooth. I'm so glad to have a diagnosis, but what a bummer - root canal here I come.
Welcome to all the new people. Let's all continue to take it one day at time, keep aware, and shut off those voices urging us to drink.
Last edited by Molly; 01-31-2012 at 08:37 AM.
Freedom Day: 12/25/11
Hello All and Happy Sober Tuesday!
Morgan – Days 3-4 were the hardest for me. My emotions were all over the place. Do whatever it takes to stay sober and it will get easier.
Mel – Congrats on Day 7 and your success on the South Beach diet! In my first 5 sober weeks I lost 4 lbs but I can’t seem to keep the weight loss going because I’ve developed a candy/sugar habit at night. Never cared for sweets at all before, and I’ll slowly wean myself off of them.
Beth – What a bittersweet story about your father and grandfather. Congrats on Day 11!
Millie – Thank you so much for jumping in and reminding us all that complacency can take us back to Day 1 if we’re not careful. ZERO TOLERANCE. In 2009 I managed 32 days of sobriety and then decided that I had proven to myself that I had it all under control. I allowed myself “a couple” of glasses of wine and after that things went to hell very quickly and I was back into 6-8 drinks every night. The difference in 2009 was that I didn’t connect with anyone. Checking in here every day takes the commitment to another level.
Molly – Glad to hear that you are doing well and will get some help for the TMJ.
Jeff – Thank you so much for the information about Louise Hay and her book ,“You Can Heal Your Life”. I checked out the DVD from the library (on waiting list for the book) and started watching last night. I started affirmations this morning.
I took a big step today and registered for a duathlon in September! (Run 2 miles, bike 22 miles, run 2 miles.) I feel confident about the biking (in the summer I often commute by bike 6 miles each way to work) but the running will be a stretch for me. Starting today, I will be in training mode for this event. Millie, that means I’ll see you over at the 30 Day Challenge thread! In order to feel my best in the duathlon I need to shed 15 lbs, and I know that between now and September I can do it.
Thank you to everyone including those I have not mentioned here. It’s amazing to be part of a global community of smart people who are all committed to sobriety and improving the quality of their lives.
I have not had a sober stretch this long since I was pregnant with my last child in 1995. I will take everything life has to offer and I WILL NOT DRINK.
Hey all my friends, it's good to hear from you. Sounds like everyone is really exerting energy to stay sober.
There are so many great ideas here- exercise, massive action, and substitution during the witching hour... I think I daily underestimate the massive action part because it's easy to maintain status quo. But that won't cut it.
Midwest Sue - I love your icon! Isn't sitting with a hot drink and a dog (or a pile of them) just the best? A good book helps... it just feels good to relax and then go to bed without the pain of drinking... day 36 rocks!
Morgan, be strong my friend.. one day at a time. We are counting with you. Eating is good and with exercise you can get a great balance.. keep up the good work and wear out this forum.
Millie, welcome back. We newcomers need your insight as you've blazed trails ahead of us. Thanks for coming. I hope we can help you as well.
JeffR1, thanks for the encouragement and congrats for getting over that hump. I always enjoy your insights. The bike ride was great. Only 2 miles from home, that mountain calms my spirit whether it's on the bike or the Elise. The point is break the routine and make the here/now count....
Beth, a very moving story and I think you offer a powerful way to inspire oneself. I do the same with an uncle who passed away a few years ago. Great job on double digits - keep it there!
Mikeinitaly, great stuff on the livestrong site. Lance's domestique (worker bee) for all his tour wins, George Hincapie, lives a couple of miles from me. Despite the controversy, I have always admired Lance for doing what he did. As a rider/runner, I find inspiration from sober people who are in good shape. I wanna be that old guy that looks good on the beach! Hey, maybe it's vain but if it keeps me sober bring it on!
Hang in there all and have a great Tuesday, early Wednesday (across the oceans).....
Great to see all the encouragement today. Beth, your story with your father and grandfather is very powerful. If you could parlay that into the reason your not drinking it would be huge. Not to mention a great idea for others. One thing I've noticed is that I feel very confident when I'm not around my old drinking friends but I will be around them soon in the near future. I suppose it is smart to plan ahead with some reasons on why we choose not to drink (I will milk Lent also ). Today is day 13 for me. Tomorrow is a big day for me. It will mark the longest time I have ever abstained from alcohol. Also, I last weighed myself the day before I stopped drinking and tomorrow is the two week anniversary. I'm hoping for some lost lbs to boost my confidence. BTW, if we're still talking about excuses for not drinking I think if we just say we're doing it for physical reasons/weight loss that would be admirable.
Stay strong friends!
Yes, date night went really well. I decided to only drink one day a week. I find that it gets easier each day. Typically for date night, I could easily have 8 shots and 3 beers and hardly any food. This last time, I had 3 shots and 2 beers. The last shot was actually making me sick to my stomach. I think next time, I will scale it back even more. I am also finding that I can enjoy my dinner much more without my alcohol. I can actually "taste" the food :-)
The house is also much cleaner without me drinking. It's as if I was wasting my time drinking and putting off the laundry, kitchen, etc.
So in the last 7 days, I only drank one time. I have saved $30 bucks and my lower back no longer hurts in the morning. It feels good to not have bottles hidden in the house or in my bag. I hated myself for waiting till trash day and wrapping all the empty bottles in foil and then placing in a cereal box and then in several trash bags. It was an awful feeling.
I now have time so many other things. I used to drink and decide that I am gonna be mad at husband for something he did years ago and then I would chew his head off and as soon as he came in from work. Now, I greet him with a smile/hug/kiss and his dinner is ready.
Thanks John. Come back and join us on the exercise challenge. We've got a crew all starting tomorrow. I definitely think exercise is the key. If I am doing that daily, I tend to not want to put crap into my body either (food or drink). Game on!
Originally Posted by John
Freedom Day: 12/25/11
Here is some inspiration for all of you for today:
Good afternoon everyone. Great job on staying sober today! Whether today is day 1 or day 100, "This is the day the Lord has made, We will rejoice and be glad in it! Psalms 118:24 Be strong and lean on the Lord. He has a plan and a purpose for your life!!!!!!!
Last edited by CJB; 01-31-2012 at 01:54 PM.
What a lot of positive posts in the past day! You are all so inspiring. As for me, I am at day 1 again today. The 5:00 voice said "Why don't you just finish off the rest of the wine - shame to waste it". I can't believe I let this voice win - it is like I am a different person in the evening and I don't understand why. I have a meeting scheduled for this evening so I won't be drinking - my problem is being home alone at night.
Thank you for all your good suggestions - keep me in your prayers those of you who pray - you are all in mine
Dear Hope - Take it one day at a time. You'll know when you are committed to sobriety. You've already taken a huge step! And a relapse does not necessarily mean you are done trying or that you have failed. I counted the first day of my new sober life on January 16th, even though I had a slip. You might want to consider doing what many of us have - pour out the booze. I know that's hard to consider. But, whether you pour it down the sink or pour in into your gullet, the money it represents is gone. And one way will feel much better than the other! Pray to God for support: "Keep on the watch and pray continually, that you may not enter into temptation." Matthew 26:41.
Hope, I do pray. And I have and will pray for you. I have had many prayers answered and seen many miracles. On Feb 3rd I will have 5 mo. sober and that itself is a miracle.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverence. Perseverence must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will recieve anything from the Lord; he is double minded, unstable in all he does" James:1-8
Hi everyone, I had kind of an interesting experience I wanted to share. I woke up from a deep dream, and I heard someone say "no way anyone could drink all that!". My immediate thought was "don't challenge us!". I can't remember who here said "1 is too many and 100 is not enough" but it is so true. Once I had one, I would just drink until there wasn't any left or I was passed out. The neat thing this morning was that although I was thinking about drinking, there was no feeling of wanting or needing to drink, it was just thinking.
I had to pour everything out. No way I would have been strong enough to just not drink if there was anything handy, and I made sure I only ran errands in the morning, otherwise too much temptation to get the evenings supply. I like Sylvane's idea that the car can't turn until it's in the driveway for those who have to be out or are driving home from work.
So many great posts!
I also wanted to share what were danger points for me. This is just my opinion, not backed up by anything else I'm aware of, but maybe it'll help someone. These were in addition to the many, many triggers for me:
- Day 4: if I made it that far, my she-devil (that's what I call it) would first try praise, oh you made it this far, see you can quit anytime, it's ok to drink. I read somewhere that it takes 3 days for the alcohol to leave the body, so by Day 4 she was really needing booze, so if being nice didn't work, she'd do anything, say anything to get me to drink. I mostly just drank, had a lot of Day 1s but sure had my share of Day 4s turning back into Day 1s.
- 2 weeks, especially the weekend before or after 2 weeks: I was only able to make it this far a few times, but this is where the "yay, you made it, you quit, you deserve a reward!" would really kick in. Or since I stuffed my emotions when I drank, by 2 weeks they'd be really out there and it was easy to just say f*** it and drink to get them to stop
- Day 25 or so to Day 33 or so: I really only did this twice. First time I made it 3 months before I had "just 1" and slowly went downhill, but "remembered" that I had quit for a year. This time I got thru the week leading up to day 28 by planning exactly what and how much I was going to drink on Day 31, making sure I'd have extra if I needed it. Hey, it was a 30 day trial, right? Around day 28 the insanity of that plan hit me - I came here to quit drinking and was planning on getting drunk? So I didn't. But I've seen a lot of people here lose it getting close to day 30, like that voice getting loud again and saying "you're no good, you'll never make it 30 days, you might as well quit now and drink". Then there's the danger after 30 days of the voice again saying, "see you made it! You quit! You can drink because you can quit any time!". Ruth's article on kindling plus the experiences of people here who've done that and are having a hard time quitting again show us that doesn't work.
Anyway, congrats to so many of you who are staying free from alcohol and good luck if you're struggling. You can do this!
Hello everyone, welcome Hope and MikeinItaly and any other newbies that I have missed. I must agree that the best way is to pour it straight down the drain. I can still remember the look of sheer amazement when I poured half a bottle of wine down the sink when I had decided enough was enough. My daughter stood there in the kitchen with me stunned in utter disbelief. I had to do it as I couldn't trust myself with a half finished bottle open in the house.
Like you Carol I have been in the situation. Last time I gave up I fooled myself into thinking that if I could last 12 months I would be "cured"!!! The sad thing was that from about 11 months I was planning what I would drink with to celebrate...... And we all know what happened next 1 led to 2 which led to a zillion....
So my message to all is simple - Say NO!!!
I will not drink today
Hi everyone. Day 21 for me and I’m feeling okay. I’m still journaling and trying to stay in the present moment. I appreciate the emphasis that is being made about NOT ‘just having one drink’ as this will likely lead to 100+. The thought has come up with me on occasion, so I am pleased to be reminded it just is not worth going there.
I trust everyone is doing okay. Welcome back Millie and best wishes. Step back up Hope and hang in there. Thanks Mikeinitaly for the links to some very informative material. I’m pleased you liked the Louise Hay DVD Midwest Sue; the book is even better! Go Beth – double digits! Dominic, what a fantastic effort – you are really going great guns. Thank you Carol for the inspiration.
And, best wishes to all other forum members. Keep up the great work everyone. Thank you.
PS: I weighed myself today and have dropped 2.7kg in three weeks of non-drinking! Bonus!!!!!
"I see humility for today as the safe and secure stance midway between violent emotional extremes. It is a quiet place where I can keep enough perspective and enough balance, to take my next small step up the clearly marked road that points toward eternal values. As I thus get down to my right size and stature, my self-concern and importance become amusing."
(Bill W., 1961. The Language of the Heart.)