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Thread: How to stop drinking

  1. #5001
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    Hello All,
    Hang in there Morgan, its worth the cravings and the anxiety. Hang in there also Alison, you will be fine, keep thinking of how proud you are to be a mum of two wonderful daughters. There will always be bullies no matter how old we get we just have to remember the tricks that got us through the playground will also work in the office environment. Bullies don't change they just get old!!!!

    Keep strong guys - remember I WONT DRINK TODAY!!!!!
    Cheers

  2. #5002
    Senior Member kevin2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nomoredayones View Post
    The period of time between 4pm (about an hour before I leave work) until 7pm is sooooo difficult. It is like a demon takes over my brain. I think of a million reasons why it would be ok to drink. Woohoo, I hope the craving during that time of the day begins to lift.
    That's the same for all of us Morgan,...the time frame might vary but we all have our prime-time (or witching hour etc.) when we would normally start drinking. That's the time,..around 4:00 to 7 or 8:00 for me that I really have to focus on filling that time with something that consumes my mind,..and my time,..and then when it gets to around 8:00 I'm home free for the night. Eating a good dinner and filling your stomach during that time makes all the difference in the world for me also.

    I think,..or theorize at least, that it has to do with our "internal clocks". The same thing develops if you've woken up at say 6:00 a.m. with an alarm clock for years,...then you decide that you are going to start sleeping until 8:00 a.m.,...you will most likely still be waking up at exactly 6:00 a.m. without the alarm for the next few weeks until your internal clock adjusts. Same deal if you get used to eating lunch at a certain time every day,....your stomach is going to start growling every day about 15-30 minutes before that time. Same deal with people who run or go to the gym at a certain time each day,...my wife is a runner and if she doesn't get to run at around 5:30 every day she's like a heroin addict who can't get a hold of her dealer.

    Both of the last 2 times I've gone long stretches sober,...after a couple of weeks the demon voice (that rationalizes and makes excuses) and the cravings subside,..and eventually that time frame becomes like any other.

    Hang in there everyone and have a clear and sober day!!!

    Kevin

  3. #5003
    Hi everyone.
    Cravings are tough. I agree with you Kevin about eating killing the alcohol craving. I have found it worked for me too.
    Like some have mentioned in earlier posts I come home from work and treat myself to coffee or tea. Trader Joe's Coca de Cafe and their organic Bolivian Blend have become some of my after work favorites. Also adding pure coca powder or pumkin spice to the coffee before brewing it is great. It has helped calm my alcohol cravings.
    Does anyone have any other craving busters to share?
    Hope everyone is doing okay and staying strong.

  4. #5004
    Super Moderator JeffR1's Avatar
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    Hi everyone. Kat, your choc-coffee sounds really nice - I'll have to try it. I really like to enjoy a coffee now when I get home from work. It's a peaceful slice of the day, after work and before cooking of dinner and relaxing for the evening.

    Regarding craving busters, I found in the earlier days of sobriety I really got benefit from fizzy drinks on ice. I put together soda water with lime or lemon cordial for a refreshing drink which was not too sweet - the bubbles of the soda water seemed to help too. Not only did help to keep the cravings at bay, I found it was a necessity in keeping my body hydrated after using alcohol for so long.

    Since then I have actually purchased my own Soda Stream machine and make my own soda water. It wasn't so much that soda water was expensive, but rather that I had set in place a new healthy ritual and I wanted to have some fun with it.

    I don't need to have as many of these drinks each night as I think my body has adjusted to not having the amount of fluid going into it as when I was drinking. I make ice cubes also and this plays its part in the whole process.

    My favourites now still include lime cordial, lemon cordial, and I change about to include ginger cordial, cranberry juice and blackcurrant juice. I recently planted some herbs out in pots and I thought today I might mix in some mint leaves with lemon cordial.

    My suggestion is to enjoy drinks which take your fancy at the time; drinks which help to quench the thirst, but are not too sweet and sugary! An important thing is to have some fun with it and I find this helps to distract the mind away from alcohol and makes the new ritual enjoyable and one you want to keep going.

    Well, today I have reached triple figures of 100 days! I am very happy about that and proud of myself. My aim now is to stop counting days and think in terms of months and weeks. I trust there will come a time when I don't feel a need to count at all.

    I still have my challenges, but I can say that it is getting better each day. I do think about drinking at times, but the thoughts and cravings are infinitely more manageable than three and a bit months ago! My unwillingness to release my sobriety grows every day and for that I am grateful.

    Thanks everyone for your support along the way. I trust you all have a great sober day.

  5. #5005
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    Hey way to go Jeff, well done that is fantastic. Welcome to the Triple Club. I am trying to think in terms of weeks now also. And this week is my 15th week in a row stone cold sober. I love it.

    With cravings one of the things I do is that I treat myself to a drink that I love but would never drink as it would seem to childish or a kiddy type drink like a "Spider" not sure what you all would call it in our global community but it is basically lemonade or any fizzy type of drink (creaming soda, or coke etc) with icecream. I used to drink it when I was a kid and its still a favourite but as a grownup (or make believe grownup!!! I would never drink it. I sit back and treat myself to something like that or a milkshake. I know some of you are thinking thats not very healthy but if it keeps you from drinking - who cares!!!!The craving will pass and believe me its easier to ween yourself off milkshakes than it is alcohol.

    Stay sober guys.
    Jacquie

  6. #5006
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    Hi all. I hope that we are all ok?
    Work stuff is not too bad. I'm actively looking for another job now as the stress is just getting too much.
    I'm off to lunch soon with a friend I met in AA 6 years ago. I haven't seen her for months and months. I'm having to pick her up as she lost her driving licence 5 weeks ago due to drink driving. We have a lot to catch up on. She wanted to meet me at the restaurant so that I can drink with her. I said no ta. I'll drive. My daughters mean too much to me for them to get back from school and I'm stinking of the stuff and talking crap. Ain't going to happen!
    Anyway....best get moving....I haven't been out in ages!!! Yeha!
    Love to you all
    Stay clean and serene!

  7. #5007
    Freedom Day: 12/25/11 Midwest Sue's Avatar
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    Jeff,
    Fantastic job on reaching 100 days!! You should feel proud of yourself. Along the way, you've been so very helpful to all of us here as well. I really enjoy your advice and your positive perspective. Jacquie, same for you. If I ever get to Australia I will have to look you both up and give you big hugs! (If that sounded creepy, not to worry. I don't think a trip to Australia is in my future. Sigh.)

    I agree that it helps a lot to treat yourself in the evening to whatever beverages strike your fancy. This week I discovered and enjoyed a new brand of local, natural soda with exotic flavors. It was expensive but certainly not as expensive as a decent bottle of wine.

    After almost 4 months I have days now when I don't think about drinking at all. Really! I'm gradually discovering so many other things to think about and do with the time I formerly used marinating my brain.

    Stay sober today! It's worth it.

  8. #5008
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    Haven't signed in for several days, but have continue to read all the post for the support. This morning is day 6 and this time I'm not "trying" to get drinking....I QUIT DRINKING. I will be successful this time. I have made up my mind to take control of my life instead of letting alcohol control my life.

  9. #5009
    Super Moderator Beth's Avatar
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    Hi all, as Alison said "I hope that we are all ok?"
    WillOvercome, you sound great. Very positive. Is the hubby home this week? If not, stay strong, you can do this!
    Still working on my white knuckling stage but it is getting better. I discovered that Massive Action also equals Massive Passion. I am finally feeling emotion which is great. Feeling emotions is giving me the passion I need to succeed.
    WE CAN ALL DO THIS!

  10. #5010
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    Congrats on 100 Jeff. I drink soda water as my primary drink. For something special, it would be a bloody mary. For me there is no association with the vodka version, so its not a trigger.

    Where I'm at a sprite/7-up with ice cream is called an ice cream soda, Jacquie. If its rootbeer with vanilla ice cream its called a rootbeer float. Some places wiil do the same with coke or fruit flavor carbonated beverage, but rootbeer is the most popular by far, for floats. Not sure if you call it rootbeer over there or not, though. I've never heard of ice cream with lemonaid before.

    I don't do caffine. A decaf with chocolate powder sounds pretty good, Kat. I probably have some dutch process for baking. Usually only drink decaf when they have it in the hotel room. If I remember I will bring a little chocolate powder along.

    Stay strong Alison. Hope its a good night out for you.

    Take care everyone,

    Todd
    Last edited by ToddE; 04-19-2012 at 09:06 PM.

  11. #5011
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    Hi all
    Are we ok? I had a lovely long afternoon with my friend. We haven't seen each other for a year! loads to catch up on. She was drinking white wine sodas which didn't bother me. I was on the fruit juice. She wanted me to take my car home and join her with the drinking. I flatly refused as I knew that having one drink would lead me into a machine. I was shocked to hear that she has been in a police cell 5 times and all drink related. She blacks pout and has a very bad temper. Another reason that I didn't drink. I needed to be in control too. She was OK though. And isn't it surprising that we never learn from out drinking antics? She is 52.
    My other friend is 50 and is on 2 bottles of wine a day and she can't remember if she has ever had a day off.
    I really find that meeting up with these people and reading these stories on here sums up so much. Alcohol is simply.............................shit!
    Toodle pip!

  12. #5012
    Senior Member bdog's Avatar
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    Hi All. Morgan im on day 12 and think you are too. I look going into my second sober weekend. baby sitting a friends crazy taco bell dog. should keep me busy and occupied when i decide to sit down and the "IT" trys to attack. no alcohol for me this weekend just lots of cleaning and cooking on the grill!!!

  13. #5013
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    Well, I slipped again. For those of you heading into Friday evening, I hope you have a good, sober evening. I didn't. I am overseas and it is now Saturday morning. I am hungover, feel bad, and really regretting that this day is shit before it even is getting started. I simply thought I could drink normally again. I started and couldn't stop. It isn't worth it to drink. I just wanted to stop in here and maybe be an example of why not to drink and possibly help someone.

  14. #5014
    Super Moderator JeffR1's Avatar
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    Thank you everyone for the kind words and congratulations. And thanks for all the support along the way; much appreciated.

    I have the weekend to myself and it's going okay. I've just been doing some things about the house and this afternoon I went for a ride on my motorbike.

    I'm noticing I'm consuming sweets and chocolate of an evening. I guess it has its place at the moment to keep my distracted, but I feel I want to do something about cutting the sugar back.

    After I got home this afternoon I had a thought about drinking come out of nowhere. It was like 'Hey, it's Saturday night. No work tomorrow. What a great night for a drink.'. Thankfully, the thought was manageable, and although it is lingering in the back of the mind, there's no way I'm going to act on it!

    Sorry to hear you are doing it tough Eric. Hang in there and jump back on that bike and start peddling again. You probably already know that none of us here can drink normally, and I don't mean to be mean by saying that. Heck, I've also tried many times to drink normally, but it didn't work for me! The thought crosses my mind now and again, and I think it would only take one drink to awaken the beast - and that scares the crap out of me. Try to be kind to yourself for now and you will feel better soon. Take care.

    Good on you bdog for getting back up there. Enjoy your sober weekend.

    Alison, well done for abstaining. Keep it going. It sounds like you've had plenty going on lately. Hang in there. And, Happy Birthday!

    Hi Watersam. Welcome to the forum. I know that feeling of 'I'll start again next week'! Congratulations on 1 week - . Keep reading and keep posting. This is a safe place to share your journey with people who can help and who understand what you are going through. Come back often. Best wishes.

    Hi everyone. Sorry I can't mention everyone by name, but you know I appreciate you all for being here. My encouragement to all and I trust everyone has a great sober weekend. Take care.

  15. #5015
    Member Dreamweaver's Avatar
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    Been lurking and keeping up with everyone...that beast sure is a doozy sometimes isn't it? Somebody, I think Midwest Sue, posted a link about the beast and it has helped me tremendously. Even though it's kinda schitzo in nature to have this separate identity voice, I now know it's not my Authentic Voice (Fiona I think brought that up?) and this Beast is just looking for an opportunity to sabotage everything to feed its craving.

    Call it cheating, but I decided to take the Vivitrol shot. Decided being stubborn and I can do it on my own crap wasn't worth trying and failing, that my AV truly wanted to be free of this. I think the combo of completing my 12 step recovery for healing, counseling, and the shot...I no longer have the desire to cope in the ways I used to. I have drank twice to test it out, and nope, you don't get the pleasure buzz from drinking cause of the shot, so the beast doesn't get fed. Since then I have found that my brain is starting to shift in dealing and coping with what used to be triggers. It might not be for everyone, but I thought I would share cause it's been helping me not have the auto response of turning to booze to deal with issues. The counseling I will say is an even bigger factor in healing and moving forward. I did not opt for the shot this month and finding the same results, when triggers are there, or hot buttons pushed, I now have new tools for coping. I do think however the Vivitrol shot is worth considering for the beginning part, but the counseling is the key part for long term healing.

    I admire those who did it cold turkey and in no way saying this is the best way. I think everyone is different in their healing recovery, and there is no right or wrong way, just our way. The bottom line is, we want to be free of this and live life. As much as I hated myself going through all of this at one point, I am now thankful for it. It has taught me to be more compassionate. Less judgmental of everyone I run into. I have become a better person in going through this, reaching out and seeing the wonderful spirits of each and everyone of you.

    Anyways, just wanted to check in and say, hang in there. The beast I have accepted will always be there in my head, but it's not me, the authentic me and it has no power over me, unless I put my guard down and surrender to letting it take over...so the key is, don't let it take over. Say no, find replacement things to do instead of drinking, work out and get some feel good endorphins to counteract the depressant alcohol contains, not to mention stress and painful feelings. Work through it, not just get over it.

    Have a wonderful weekend and choose YOU.
    Last edited by Dreamweaver; 04-21-2012 at 08:55 AM.

  16. #5016
    Just Todd ToddE's Avatar
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    Hey Evereyone,

    Eric, Sorry about your fall. Hope you pick yourself back up quickly. Traveling is always tough. I read through some of your back posts, just now. There is a lot of good stuff in there. You may want to read back them. You can do this. Don't let a little setback here and there get you down.

    Anne, Good to see you posting. Congrats on 6days.

    Bdog, sounds like a plan for the weekend. I may try and get some grilling in also. Good luck with the taco bell dog.

    I,m off to take the kids to a b-day party.

    Take care,

    Todd

  17. #5017
    Senior Member bdog's Avatar
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    Hi Sylvane, i got up early too. 4:30am way too early but i feel pretty good. waking up that early sober feels so much better than waking up from passing out and going to the freezer for a shot because I have a headache from the days before. I really need to have those days behind. Its almost two weeks and Im a little ansey on the weekends but feel good. have a good day all!

  18. #5018
    Senior Member kevin2's Avatar
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    You don't sound whiney at all ww43,..and welcome btw. Just a question,..you mentioned being a stay at home Mom with 2 daughters. Are they of the ages where you could work while they are in school? If so, you might consider that,..since alot of your problem sounds like boredom (?). It would occupy your time during what seem to be your toughest hours. My wife went back to work about a year ago,..about 30 hours a week while our (4) kids are at school,..still off in time to pick them up at 2:45. She had some of the same issues,..and it was mainly from boredom, so it's been great for her,..not to mention the extra money. With your education level, you should have alot of options,..as I said, just a thought.

    Kevin

  19. #5019
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    Hello everyone. Just checking in after a couple of months of trying to beat the beast. Tried almost everything - didn't buy any, taper off, buy only a little, drink club soda between each glass, etc. Didn't work. Saw a therapist that wanted me to replace alcohol with valium. I hate valium. Then 9 days ago there was light at the end of the tunnel. First, if you filled my house with wine I would either fall down and break my neck (came close to that many times) or something worse. BUT if you filled my house with beer there is a limit to how much I can drink. It fills me up. My average WAS 2 bottles + of wine every night = 8+ drinks. For 9 days I haven't bought a single bottle of wine and have 4 beers at night. My alcohol consumption was cut in half literally overnight. Not only that, but beer doesn't get me wasted like wine. No blackouts (like honey what did we eat for dinner last night?) I wake up feeling great AND I haven't even stopped drinking yet! Next course of action is 3 beers instead of 4 and then take a day off here & there and increase the days off and reduce the beer. The first 3 days I had cold sweats during the night and felt very tired in the morning. I think if I went cold turkey I would have had a lot more than that. Of course I wish for a glass of wine which was my companion for so many years and it isn't easy, though the reward of not needing alka seltzer every morning makes it worth it. Still a ways to go and need time to prove myself but this the most sober I have been in 16 years. Wish us all luck. Monday morning update - only 3 beers last night!
    Last edited by soberpeter; 04-23-2012 at 03:26 AM.

  20. #5020
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    Hi all and welcome to ww43 and sober Peter. If you look back on previous posts, there is nothing that hasn't been said before. This is a nasty hook that has had (or having) a rotten effect on us all. ww43, I have a friend who drinks 2 bottles of wine throughout the day and I asked her why and she replied that it helps her cope with boredom. She is 51 and lacks confidence to do anything. I said that the reasons were not that. It's the booze that makes us feel useless, paranoid and shit!
    The thing that I like about this site is that no-one is here to judge our relapses. If I felt that was the case, I wouldn't be typing. My local AA doesn't take kindly to relapsers. I didn't stay there long. Not that I was relapsing, I didn't like the lack of support it gave to people and it was very clicky.
    Anyway, I had some wine and vodka last night!!! and I feel like CCCRRRRAAAAPPPP!
    Still, back on that stupid bike and pedalling fast!
    Toodle pip

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