How to stop drinking

[Beth]

Wow, I am incredibly inspired by everyone here!
Sue & James thank you for the suggestions for white knuckling through.
James & Hope, thank you for the videos. Both where so powerful.
Joseph, thank you for the Hungry Ghost link. The article truly verbalized how I have felt my whole adult life. I knew I wasn't alone as an alcoholic but I did feel pretty isolated in my thoughts on life.....I never learned the skills needed to define my purpose. I think a lot of us go through life knowing we are here for some reason but how do you start to figure that out. I am an educated person but no one in my life has ever explained this to me. Since finding you guys I now have the tools I need to find my most purposeful path. And what I don't have currently, as long as I continue to grow I will obtain them.
For me I have lived my life thinking "Is this it? Is this all there is? I have reached for the stars and have held them in my hand but so.....I want more." BUT what is more?
Again Joseph, thank you, without the definition of the hungry ghost I would never have realized how much it plays a part in my life, personality, and coping mechanisms. It is a major breakthrough for me to continue to look for alternatives.....ANY ALTERNATIVE to alcohol.
ToddE, enjoy Disney sober!
Bryan, when are you headed with the family to see Mickey? Is it coming up?

My motto today is " I AM strong enough to stay sober, just don't drink today."
No Matter What!

[Eric]

Good morning! It is wonderful to wake up to day 3. I am finally actively back in a recovery mode. I seem to have to cycle through a cycle to become willing again and I am finally there. I am waking up to a morning meditation that is structured around looking at the evidence of my drinking (2 decades of failed attempts to quit or control), the impacts of my drinking (declining mental and physical health), the vision of the person I want to be, and the decisions I have to make that day to move toward fulfilling that vision. I follow that with a reading and a bit more pondering on the topic. That seems to get my mental thinking aligned in the right direction. I then repeat that before I go to lunch and before I leave the office in the evening. I commit to not drinking today and exercising today. As the third day, today I will face the last of the bad physical withdrawal symptoms, which I will need to be on guard for. A quick trip to the treadmill helps to diffuse the nervous feeling I normally get. I hope everyone is having a great and sober day or night.

[Beth]

Eric, I am happy you found your "mojo". Good going! Where are you waking up? Did you move from Texas? Or just still on business? I sent you a PM the other day to a link I thought you might like. Did you get it?
Never quit quitting! Take care and this time it's going to stick!

[Eric]

Yes, I got the link. Thanks! I am on an overseas business trip. It is always a difficult when travelling like this - it goes one of two way: either crash and burn or get it together. Luckily, it is coming together now.

[James G]

Eric, you know what you need to do...grab "IT" and choke "IT" into submission...Just do it...that's all there is to it!

[nomoredayones]

nomoredayones-how are you? I have missed you posting. Check in soon, hope all is good.

Thank you for checking in with me Sylvane. Today is 7 days for me. I wanted to get a week under my belt before I posted again though I have been reading. I feel both strong and weak - does that make sense? I understand the AA concept now of admitting powerlessness. I feel like I have been in a boxing match with alcohol for too long now and I am getting more and more injured. There is no shame in admitting defeat and ending the fight. My other option in staying in the ring until the alcohol kills me.
It is one day at a time but, for myself, I find I have to remember, alcohol HAS to be out of my life for good. I am having so many emotions. Emotions I would have medicated with alcohol. Now I have to learn to simply FEEL and fill my life with more productive activities. The hours I wasted drinking, being drunk, and recovering (hangover). I will never get them back but I don't have to lose another hour to a bottle of white wine.
I am wishing everyone a sober and serene weekend.

[john48]

Hi My name is John today is day six I have not been able to go past six months for some reason. Relapsed twice just days before the six month point. The good news is I have spent most of
the last two years sober. I found this site because I am more into a holistic approach. I don't hate AA but I am an Atheist and I just don't buy the whole program at all. I have really tried hard
too. But that is another story. I will probably go back just to hear the stories and I always seem to learn something, but I need more.

[Kat]

I am back again with another day 1 and the hope that this is the last one. I began drinking again thinking I had it under control but i over did it yesterday and feel so badly. I should not have stopped coming here. I just feel so horrible today and so depressed. So i am at day 1 again and looking to this forum for support.

[john48]

Hang in there, I am on day six and i just lost almost six months. The depression really got to me this time, I was in a bad way. Day four I almost said screw it but I didn't .
I started cleaning up the mess that I had made in my apartment from my over three week blotto black out drunk. When I woke up on Friday I was so relieved
to not be hung over and I turned on the lights and smiled I forgot about cleaning up. I hate starting over too.
John

[Kat]

Thanks. I feel so low today and have no one to share it with in my physical world. I am just reading away here. I really have to stop doing this to myself. I feel so bad. I am happy to read some of you have had success.

[jennapope]

Hang in there. Maybe joining a different AA group would help? Get involved at a church? That's what I did. In my prayers. . . Join my site for company:

http://addictionhelp4u.blogspot.com/

It is new. There is one man on there who quit on his own. This guy is a tower of strength. He can help you, I'm sure. . .

You are not alone.

Virtual Hugs, Jenna

[WillOvercome]

Embarassed and ashamed to admit I fell down on Thursday night. I didn't consume my usual amount but I did open a bottle of wine and partake of to much. Any is to much for me. So here I am again. I was so determined and feel so defeated. I will push on though. Thanks for all the encouragement.

[hope]

Hi everyone

We only fail when we stop getting back up - I can't tell you how many times I have gotten back up and I will never stop until I keep standing. I am doing good - day 2 for me and determined to keep going - so wishing you all strength and determination! Someone told me the difference between the Saints and the Sinners isn't the fact that Saints were born perfect, but the fact that they never gave up - we can do this - keep looking upwards. Love to you all

[ToddE]

Hope, WillOvercome, Kat,

Glad to here your hanging in there / getting backup. A lot of people wouldn't get backup when they fall off.

[Beth]

Good Evening Everyone. Welcome John48 and Jennapope. Welcome back Kat.
Hope everyone is treating themselves good and also gentle.
WillOvercome, I don't give much advice but what I have learned is that this is a process. I wanted so badly to succeed the first time but didn't. So now I just try to learn from my relapse. And I am learning....the more mornings I wake up sober I try to remember that feeling. It doesn't alway keeps me from not drinking but sometimes it will. I also am learning that during this beginning time, I need to continue to grow. And for me that is reading as much as possible not only here but every site I can find. Two that have been recommended are rational recovery and SMART.
Stay focused on you above all!

[Kat]

Thank you. Getting back up is getting harder. I know i won't be able to do it much longer.

[ToddE]

John,

Welcome aboard.

I've always avoided AA for the same reason. This time on my recovery I decided to look for an alternative and found this site as well. For me anyway the forum posting helps. The others here have all been supportive.

If you are interested in non-religious live support group meetings www.smartrecover.org might be helpful for you. In a metro area like Portland, I would assume they would have something near you.

Good luck on finding what works for you. It sounds like you are on the right track.

-Todd

[Mel]

Hey all,
Doing well - looking at spring break and that means too much time alone. This is a process - so, as everyone has been reinforcing . . . keep at it. The very idea that you are here and posting and aware of the problem, that is worth a lot.

Last night, because I was 'being responsible' (= sober) I was able to drive a friend home. It is the first time in my whole drinking life where I stood up to a friend in trouble and said 'hey, hand 'em over'. That was a pretty important moment for me. How many times have I been too drunk to drive and did. How many times did I recognize a friend who was too drunk and let them drive. Unbelievable.

[Eric]

Recently, I made the decision to go to AA meetings because I like the power of face-to-face interaction. I thought it would offer an opportunity to participate ina group of like-minded people. However, I soon realized that instead of trying to live sober, I was now trying to decide whether or not to join AA and what to do about its belief system and approach. This morning I tossed out the Big Book and Daily Reflections book. I am responsible for my own recovery. I am not saying it is bad for everyone, but it is not for me. I will be relying on this group for support and insights from now on. Thanks to everyone for participating here. Happy recovery! For the rest of the day I will not drink, no matter what, and I will take positive action to improve my life (instead of convincing myself I am weak and need to turn it over to something I don't believe in).

[Ruth]

I hear a lot of people struggling here- and it is a struggle, isn't it. We keep trying to make bargains with ourselves, with alcohol, with God- when really it is so simple, ridiculously simple. The way to quit drinking is to stop putting alcohol in your body. That simple- not easy, though. What are we so afraid of that we can't face it sober? I recommend waiting through whatever feeling it is to see what is on the other side. It is not that bad, believe me. What I find these days after about 10 months sober is that I can stand at my own height now- I am not constantly second guessing myself, not constantly feeling somehow guilty or less-than (I didn't think I was feeling guilty when I was drinking, but I was constantly trying to mitigate my behavior- not hugging people too close so the wouldn't smell my breath [right!], you know the drill). For me, stopping was like throwing a switch- no more bargaining, no more if only I could drink like a normal person, no more only on the weekends. Whatever alcohol was supposed to give me, over 30 years of steady drinking, I still hadn't found it.

Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox. Eric, there are other non-religious groups around, maybe in your area... and I came close to finding a group, but then it kind of just became a moot point. Whatever gives you a spiritual balance is the right thing to do. The companionship in groups like this one can work just fine- it did for me.

STAY (sober today and yesterday)