How to Quit Drinking Alcohol

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Anyone who is trapped in a cycle of alcoholism probably wants to quit drinking alcohol, but fear holds us back. This is why denial manifests itself. The alcoholic can come up with all sorts of reasons of why the do not want to quit drinking, but deep down it is always fear that keeps us from taking action and making a change.

I don’t know how to help you get past that fear. I just know that if you are sick and tired of living the way that you’ve been living, at some point you will throw up your hands and say “This is it. I have to make a change.” This is the point of surrender and it is when you are able to move past the fear of not drinking. Something happens on an inner level and you decide that it is time to try something different. And thus you ask for help. You ask others how you should live. This is the point of surrender and you have to reach this point in order to make any lasting changes in your life. If you do not reach this psychological threshold then any attempts to quit drinking will most likely fail.

Like I said I am not sure how to actually induce this state of surrender in people, but now that you know about it you can at least identify if you are ready to quit drinking or not. If you are ready, then what follows is some basic information on the other stuff you should probably know about.

Physically quitting alcohol

Quitting drinking is dangerous. Alcohol withdrawal can be fatal. Not taking a drink can actually kill a person. These are true statements and you have to realize that if someone is heavily addicted to alcohol then they are in great danger if they suddenly stop drinking alcohol. If this is the case in your situation then you might need to seek immediate medical treatment. If someone stops drinking suddenly and they are starting to shake violently then you need to get them to an emergency room immediately.

Because of this danger, the best option is really to quit drinking in a treatment center or drug rehab facility. There you will be under constant medical care in a supervised detox area. This is the ideal route to go just for the sake of safety alone. Any other method of detox is going to introduce more risk to the person’s health, so ideally you should try to quit drinking at a treatment center.

Basically what happens at a treatment center is that the staff there will monitor your vital signs and give you medication that will keep you from going through several withdrawal symptoms. In some cases the medicine that they give to a person will prevent them from having seizures.
quit drinking

Alcoholics Anonymous

Many people who struggle to quit drinking alcohol will find their way to Alcoholics Anonymous. This is a huge solution for alcoholism that can be found in many different countries all over the world. In the United States, there are AA meetings in every major city, and pretty much any mid-sized or even smaller city as well. They are pretty much everywhere.

The AA program is probably, on the whole, a good thing that is generally helpful. Those who dedicate themselves to the program tend to do well. If you look at the total numbers when it comes to success in AA, you may get discouraged though. Out of the thousands who pass through the door of AA, only a handful stay sober permanently. Many people reject the program outright and simply never return, according to AA census data. And of course, many of these people are those who are court-ordered to attend meetings and do not really want to be there anyway.

The AA program works for some, and it has the added benefit of basically being free. It is crazy not to take advantage of this and at least give the program a chance to work in your life. If it is not for you, then simply move on.

Quit drinking pill

Is there a pill to help you quit drinking? Alcoholics joke that if there was such a pill, then they would probably overdose on it. Medical science has not yet solved the problem of addiction, but they are coming out with new medications every once in a while that supposedly reduce cravings for alcohol and other drugs.

One such pill for alcoholism is called Campral. This is a pill that is taken several times each day and is proven to help reduce cravings for alcohol. It does not work miracles though, but it might be helpful for some. Many people who have used the medication have ended up relapsing anyway. It is not a magic bullet. At the present time, there is no magic bullet.

Quit drinking soda

If you want to quit drinking soda, then the process is a little bit different from quitting alcohol, though some of the concepts might be the same. You might try substitution as your primary method of giving up fountain drinks, such as by drinking milk, tea, or water instead of your daily soda.

Another technique is to slowly transition away from soda. Most people who are addicted to soda drink several each day. Start by replacing just one of your sodas with an alternative beverage such as milk, tea, or juice. Stick to that one replacement drink for a week or two and then try to replace a second soda with your replacement beverage. Thus you can transition away from soda and hardly even notice that you are missing it.

If the caffeine is part of the addiction with soda, then you will have to deal with that as well. You can replace the soda with regular tea, which does have some caffeine (regular tea, not herbal or green, which generally are caffeine free). This is, of course, quite a bit different from learning how to quit drinking alcohol. Really it is like comparing apples to oranges.

Quit drinking lose weight

If you quit drinking alcohol will you lose weight? You bet. Alcohol is empty calories that can seriously add up if you consume large quantities throughout the day or night. Pretty much any alcoholic who stops drinking will shed at least a few pounds due to the reduction in these empty calories. Sometimes this is all gained back when developing a sweet tooth in early recovery, but the trade off is more than worth it, as the alcoholic drinking carries a number of other problems with it as well that are far worse than weight gain.

Quit binge drinking

Some alcoholics are binge drinkers and do not drink alcohol every single day. Instead, they may go days, weeks, or months without taking a single drop of alcohol, then they will binge drink for several days straight. This can become tricky because the person can easily convince themselves that they do not really have a problem, because they can go for so long without taking a drink.

In the end, they need to get honest with themselves and see that alcohol is still a problem for them, even if they have periods of abstinence. When they binge, they completely lose control and cannot stop themselves from continuing to drink. Binge drinking can be deadly and it is also very difficult to arrest due to the long periods of abstinence that can keep the alcoholic stuck in denial for year and years.

Quit drinking medication

There are some other medications that might be used to help a person to quit drinking alcohol, such as Antabuse or Naltrexone. Antabuse is a preventative medication that makes the alcoholic violently ill if they drink alcohol while taking the drug. It has been used with some success but for the most part it is just a way for the alcoholic to try and manipulate themselves. Naltrexone is another medication that tries to reduce cravings for alcohol by reducing the effectiveness of the alcohol in creating pleasure in the brain.

There will probably be more medications to help people quit drinking that will be developed in the coming years, and it is very likely that none of them will be a magic cure that solves the problem completely.

Stop drinking alcohol

Ultimately the solution for any alcoholic is to simply stop drinking alcohol and learn how to live a sober life. This is easier said than done and of course this is why there are all sorts of programs out there to try and help alcoholics to recover.

It is not enough to merely abstain from alcohol. If this were true then we could cure alcoholism at the individual level without any help at all. The solution has to go beyond the alcohol itself because the problem is more fundamental than an addiction to a substance. Something inside of the alcoholic is a bit off and causes them to self medicate and self destruct. Alcohol is just one vehicle for doing so. There are other options available and alcoholics will eventually find them if they are not working on a positive solution for more healthy living.

You can’t just stop drinking booze and expect recovery to happen. You have to work for it by creating positive change in your life on an ongoing basis. This is the growth that fuels recovery.

Can you quit drinking alone?

Of course people actually have quit drinking alcohol alone but it is not recommended for the reasons listed above. But there are other reasons to seek treatment and find others to help you with quitting drinking.

Part of the definition of alcoholism is that we cannot stop drinking by ourselves. If we could then it would not be a true addiction. The fact that we are hopelessly addicted means that we need help in order to quit. This is another strong reason to seek treatment.

At a treatment center, you will get help in several ways, all of which give you a great advantage over trying to quit on your own:

1) Peer support – in treatment, you will meet other people who are trying to quit drinking just like you are. Believe it or not you can help each other to stay sober. This is a powerful concept in recovery.

2) New knowledge – you will learn a great deal in treatment about how to live a life without alcohol. You will learn from the therapists and counselors, as well as from your peers. This is important because when we first get sober, we do not know enough information about how to live sober. We need new knowledge for recovery.

3) Safe environment - you will not be as tempted to drink or use drugs because you will be in a safe and supportive environment.

In early recovery, networking with other people is especially important. Don’t try to quit drinking alone or you’ll only make it harder on yourself. Use the benefits of working with others in recovery to your advantage and your chances of staying sober will increase greatly.

quit drinking alcohol
Photo by billaday

What does it take to stay sober in the long run?

After you quit drinking, you of course have the rest of your life ahead of you to deal with. How are you going to do it sober? If you can’t answer this question, then you need to take action and find out what your path in sobriety is going to consist of.

Nobody stays sober by sitting on the couch all day and wishing that their life was different. If you want to quit drinking then you have to actually do something. Recovery demands action. If you just focus on eliminating the drinking behavior then you are going to fail. You have to replace that life of drinking with a life of passion and purpose. You have to find things that excite you in recovery and get involved with them. Essentially, you must create a new life for yourself in recovery.

Creation is the key to long term sobriety. Creating this new life is how you actually quit drinking in the long run. If you don’t create a new life that is worth living, then you will eventually return to the drinking.

Let’s face it: alcoholics love to drink. It is their passion. So would you expect them to walk away from this passion and live a boring and uneventful life? It will never happen. The alcoholic knows that they can find at least some excitement and satisfaction with being drunk, even if it brings some misery along with it. Over time, the alcoholic will remember the good times of drinking and forget how miserable it ended up making them. This will lead to relapse if they do not have a compelling reason to stay sober.

Therefore, you need a compelling reason to stay sober. The way to find this reason is to create it in your life. Find your passion. Find your joy. Find a way to reach out and help other people in recovery. Create a life that is worth living sober and you will remain sober. If you get lazy and allow yourself to stagnate and become bored then your mind will return to thoughts of drinking.

Purpose. Meaning. Passion.

Quit drinking alcohol and start living. Simple as that.


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  • bina

    i just want to quit.i was almost raped this weekend and i got a child she is so beautiful i love my child.please i need help

  • Patrick

    Hi there Bina

    Sorry you had to go through such trauma. Try to ask for help from someone who really cares about you. I would recommend that you find help at a treatment center if you can get in some where.

    Stay away from toxic people. Anyone who almost raped you probably qualifies as toxic. You need help in order to recover and that means you need support from positive people.

    Ask for help. Good luck….

  • Tim

    Yes I agree.
    Not to sound harsh…..But If You love Your baby..the one who really really needs You in her/his life You must…, please pick up the phone book and look for AA or go see your family Dr. Call a friend or Family member and tell them whats going on and You are ready to hit the straight and narrow path!
    You can do it!
    Post back if You need any help.
    God bless You and child

  • Patrick

    Thanks for the encouragement there, Tim. Hopefully Bina can find a path of recovery for her sake as well as that of her baby.

  • Lilaclily

    I have found that simple things can make such a difference.

    For example, I am not a cook at all. It was simpler for me to offer someone a beer than cook.

    However, I went to a friend of mine’s house that does not drink anymore and looks awesome.

    She fixed me a smoothie in 4 minutes. What a revelation!
    It was so delicious, i actually did not want to drink that day when I was at her house.

    There are numerous websites that show how to do it. It is so simple. is my favorite because you can change the recipe depending on how many people you are doing it for.

    I like fresh strawberries, bananas etc. versus frozen because it tastes so much better. I say to my self “yes fruit can be expensive, but i am saving on alcohol and beauty cremes and diets”.

    I feel great, look thinner and the energy is a kick!!!

  • http://nil Gurvinder

    Dear Sir/Mdm,

    I have having issues with my fiancee coz of my drinking habits. Im not a alcoholic, but i cant control my drinking .. Once i start i tend to carry on till i being mad and behave violently . I need help . Please advise me what to do and how i should overcome this problem im going through ..

  • Patrick

    @ Gurvinder – you say “I am not an alcoholic, but I cannot control my drinking.”

    What do you think an alcoholic is, Gurvinder? Most of them are functional actually, walking around, holding jobs, wrecking cars here and there, destroying marriages, etc.

    I would suggest that you go to rehab. Seriously. Get treatment. Ask for help.

    What else are you gonna do? Drink some more?

    Change your life. Do it.

  • John

    I very recently stopped drinking after it was apparent I was going to lose my family. If I wouldn’t have made the decision to quit then at best my family would’ve stayed and been disfunctional forever.

    I wasn’t comfortable with AA but I was with the Pastor of my church. Although AA wasn’t for me I still needed to be held accountable for my actions.

    I made an appointment and told the truth about my drinking for the first time. I cryed for hours after that as reality hit hard.

    I call my Pastor/Sponsor/Advisor what ever you’d like to call him whenever I feel weak and also to share the victories.

    My wife is more proud of me than I ever imagined.

    You must trust someone or some program to help you as you need to be held accountable by someone who loves you.

    More importantly I am for the first time proud of myself and I will try as hard as possible not to let all of us down.


  • Patrick

    Awesome stuff, John. That is very inspiring stuff you have going on there. Sounds like you are really changing your life. Congratulations. Keep us posted on your progress, would love to hear about it!

  • Prasad

    Dear sir,
    I have been drinking for abou 5 to 6 years and I joined in People’s Assocition for social Service (W.H.O)to stop drinking.They have examined Liver function test,Blood percentage,sugar levels,B.P…Reports:Liver function is ok,Blood percentage is 11,all are normal.They have given me some tablets and injections and stayed there one month.After coming from there ,i continued taking tablets till now as suggested.Wholly I have stopped drinkinng two months ago.But after coming home now i feel just like vomiting,sleeplessness,fast heart beat,inflammation in heart,feel body cold,depressive,fear,constipation,fever etc.,….Could you please suggest me the remedy,precautions,food?
    Could u please tell me what i’m suffering from?
    Thank u very much sir….

  • Patrick

    @ Prasad – I wish I was an MD but I am not. Two months after quitting drinking, it is definitely not acute withdrawal. But it could be PAWS – which stands for Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. That would be quite a severe case based on the symptoms you are describing though, and I have never seen it that bad before.

    Therefore I would seek out medical care from a general practitioner, to see what is going on. I really don’t think it is related to your drinking history…..

  • Fahad

    my name is fahad nd i really have drinking problems i drink every night while watching movies my whole day revolves around thinking abt drinking nd i have made it a routine that every nite i will watch movies nd keep drinking until im drunk nd then go to sleep i have tried to control it but it just seems impossible i dont know may be u can call me a super addict i can get addicted to almost anything which is harmful to me ,,, so plz help me out here mr Patrick.

  • iesha

    after reading the comments by the user gurvinder my drinking habits are similar 2 his once i start i cant stop and the advice patrick gave was rehab.i really neva gave rehab a thought because i figured i can go cold i making a mistake??

  • John

    Hi, I don’t drink during the week and tend to drink on weekends with friends. Sometimes I drink too much other times I am able to drink moderately. I would like to get counseling to reduce my alcohol intake in those social situations…my problem is that I really enjoy wine and beer. I realistically believe that I can live without liquor but I will have a hard time not being able to have a moderate amount of wine at dinner or the occasional beer. My fiancee drinks too but if I get drunk she gets very angry with me. Your advice is welcome.

  • Patrick

    @ John – It sounds like you are a good candidate to seek counseling, rather than inpatient rehab.

    You might just have a drinking problem.

    Time (and consequences) will tell you for sure. If you can use counseling to experiment with complete abstinence from alcohol, that would probably be the most helpful path. But also the hardest…..

    Good luck.

  • Luvai

    My case is similar to john, i dont do liquer during the week but the amount i consume over the weekend is alarming. The problem is i’ve tried quittin but i have my big brother wih whom i stay with and has made it a routine so its hard 4 me to stop kauz we do it with him and its hard resisting the temptation of a beer call up. How can avoid such challenges, i LOATHE the things i do when high

  • bk

    i just wanted to say i been sober for 75 days and felt great until i went out to a bar with my wife everything was fine until i say i want to be normal and have one or two that didnt happen it turn to a party of my own needless to say my wife was relly pissed at me and i cant blame her it was my own doings thinking i can be normal i am not when it come to drinking i am sober again thank god i was playing with fire everything is better sober thats the way i will live from now on i will update soon after i get passed 75 days again.

  • bk

    will it get better someday

  • Patrick

    @ bk – yes it will get better.

    For me it took about 6 months of recovery and continuous abstinence from all drugs before I could realize that, yes, life was suddenly a whole lot better now that I was sober.

    But it took some time. You have to press on…..

  • Sara

    I’m 20 and trying to quit & it has taken me ages to trust anyone to try and let them help me, they had been saying for months,’we want to help you, if only you will let us’. I finally find trust to ask for help and then they tell me they only want to help me if i quit in detox, which just sends me into drinking more

  • FPM


  • erin t

    I’m 21 and I’m a binge drinker. I’ll binge drink 3 to 4 times a week normally. I had a problem with drugs and I kind of used drinking to replace that.
    I always forget what happens at the end of the night. And if I’m with a guy I will be all over him and regret what happens the next day. I’m not at all like that sober.
    I quit drinking for a while because I was in a long distance relationship and my bf didn’t want me to drink so I didn’t. I was so proud of myself. But that fell apart and now I feel like I’m worse off than I’ve ever been.
    I don’t know how to stop. I love drinking, I’m happy when I drink. But I can’t keep on like this.

  • kiki

    Pretty useful information I have 4 days on the wagon and I already felt the exact withdraws mentioned in this article. I decided to quit because I got into an arguement with my wife and was on my way to cut my vains. I was too drunk to rationalize anything. So that’s it

  • Micheal

    hey hi ppl………
    my dad is drinkin late nights n my mom is really worried n angry on this behalf of his. Over the years they hav started to talk less n fight more n more.
    My dad has been drinkin frm about 20 or so years nw.
    Plzzz sumone help me revolving my family’s love.
    Rehab is nt a very gud option in the place i live.
    Plz help

  • veerende Rao

    Hi I am Virender Rao .. i am drinking alcohol since 6 years, from past 2 years i am drinking high and making my relations get spoiled .. As i am 23 yr old i don’t want it to be happen anymore with me ..

    So kindly suggest me the beat ways to quit alcohol naturally as i can’t afford to be treated in rehab..

  • Patrick

    @ Veerende – I would strongly urge you to find a way to go to rehab, as quitting drinking can be dangerous. A proper medical detox is the best way to go, really.

    Good luck…

  • meme me

    I have been so inspired by all of you. I’m totally addicted to alcohol… trying to quit for 2011. I just wish that I could go to rehab but I have kids…

  • Budvapor

    I’m at my time to quit drinking , my vaporising weed really helps and I want this year to be the best and get out of my deppresion caused by binge drinking alone and when I drink socially I find people to just become idiots and wish my friends would sober up too

  • Tina V

    I’m so tired of drugs and alcohol. I’ve been drinking since I was 14 yrs old. I’m 35 yrs. old now and my life has gone to crap. I am a binge drinker and pill popper. I feel like life is not worth living, I have zero passion for life. I want things to change but I keep freakin relapsing and its so frustrating. I find it really hard to trust people. I hate being alone and not having a relationship yet I keep pushing everyone away with my behavior. I tell people what they want to hear, reel them in then crap all over them. My behavior is not normal when I’m high, its actually extremely disturbing. Sometimes I feel so confused and I don’t know who I am or what I want, just a complete mess. I want to be sober and have a semi decent life. I’m not married and I don’t have any children. I would like to someday but I don’t want to put a child through what I went through. I think abuse is pass on through generations and the thought of emotionally and physically abusing a child is horrible. I don’t think my parents planned to abuse me but they did because they were abused as well. I need counseling and help to deal with a lot of things in my life if I’m going to have a shot. Living this way is horrible. Constant depression and fear is no way to live life. I don’t have a supportive family or friends. I do have a drug counselor and sponsor I talk to occasionally. I know why I keep holding myself back from recovery. I hate when things don’t go my way. I don’t have a problem with being honest about my problems( obviously) but I don’t know how to deal with my memories. If someone can give me any suggestions on how to live a sober life and make sober friends and try to keep them I would really appreciate it. Thanks

  • tish

    i have been drinking heavily or maybe not so heavily since teenage hood parents breaking up,moving out on my own at 16,sister going through abortions,living with a older man that i married and having failed relationships,i wondered what is wrong with me i have not got shakes but i turn to a drink when frustrated

  • anoop

    All u guys.
    Respect to all u. Drinking is a habbit….eating is the same….breathing..watching or seeing with eyes…or touching….smelling….all are blessings…did we drink alcohol when we were born………..think….didnt we sleep at that time…..its bloody booze lessons would help..its your mind..your body..your life……………

  • anoop

    Respect to all u. Drinking is a habbit….eating is the same….breathing..watching or seeing with eyes…or touching….smelling….all are blessings…did we drink alcohol when we were born………..think….didnt we sleep at that time…..its bloody booze lessons would help..its your mind..your body..your life……………

  • mick

    I have been a heavy drinker for over 25 years and all you friends here who are asking for advice, congratulations – you have made the first step, which is admitting that you have a problem and wanting to do something about it. I now enjoy life so much more, that I am not drinking. No more feeling crappy in the morning, no more hiding and avoiding the ringing telephone, no more counting the beers in the fridge and looking at the clock and thinking when the store closes…I feel free after being a prisoner of my addiction. And trust me, cutting back or only keeping it to the weekends etc. only works for a short time. I have fooled myself with that too many times. I wish you all strength and determination!!! You can do it, you can do anything, if you put your mind to it. For information, I had to go to the emergency room a few times over the years – that’s how bad I was…I missed work very often and the only way I could get dry is by doing a step by step withdrawal. Not everyone can do that. As mentioned above, quitting suddenly can be dangerous also. If you can’t do it, seek help. It’s an illness and there are people out there, willing to help. Good luck and god bless.

  • mick

    Oh, another important thing: find something to do – ANYTHING! You have to keep busy and occupy your mind. Hang out with non drinking people. Drink tons of tea and juice. I make a gallon of green tea every day and drink it cold.

  • Ray

    I gave up drinking 2 years ago for 6 months. I thought that after that period of time it would be easier to manage my drinking. I decided to drink 1 night just to see how it would be. I ended up drinking way too much as my body could not handle it. I have since gotten help with a support group and they put in place a lot of little interventions that helped me quit drinking for a period of 10 weeks. That was good until I tried managing my drinking again.
    It was going well until recently when my father suffered a ruptured brain anuerysm. My days were spent at hospital then every afternoon when I arrived home I would drink until I would pass out after many beers/tears. I have since had the urge to drink everyday. My next few months will be interesting as I will trying to quit again as I feel my life is getting away from me again. Friends are now saying that I drink like they new me to previously and they aren’t being supportive. My best support for this now is me and I’m determined to prove them wrong as well because I know now that I can do it and the willpower you find within will help me along the way. The hardest part is my friends are all heavy drinkers and want me to drink with them. I still drink more than them anytime I drink so it is up to me to keep my mind strong when I am around them

  • Anonymous

    I’m in college and i can predict what my life will be like if i continue to drink. it hinders me from achieving excellence and its def time to stop.

  • anonymous

    I am a binge drinker, and just like the article says I have been living in denial about it for years. Today I finally accepted it is a problem and have decided to make a change and remove alcohol from my life for good. It is hindering my life, relationships,success and I am going to take control and no longer let it be in control of me by never having a sip again.

  • anonymous

    I have had a drink every single day of my life since my late teens. Have had great jobs but always lose them. I just want to stop but it is very hard, it feels like being w/o alcohol is not normal. It is also hindering my family life.

  • http://howtoquitdrinking brian s

    i am 46 years young, but feel very old; 2010 was a good year as I drank but twice. I have had five episodes so far in 2011 and I am now suicidal as I cannot bare the knowledge of the harm I have committed to my family. I have been battling drinking and drugging for the last 20 some years and the problem stems all the way back to adolescence. Every foot forward results in a greater crash when I return to drinking. Sometimes I think it would be better to go live under a bridge.

  • Andrew

    Brian S. Your story is a sad, and unfortunately all too common one. Please seek help and don’t do anything rash. Your family may have suffered because of your substance issues, but you cannot atone for your actions if you commit suicide and leave them shell shocked and alone. Show them you have changed, make them your priority. Do anything it takes to show them that you care enough about them to change. If it is to late to be reconciled with them, then change for yourself. Life is too precious and fleeting to throw away. It is not going to be easy. I wish you the best of luck, don’t give up.
    I am struggling with alcohol myself. Even if we think it’s just a harmless couple, not doing us and our families any harm it’s because we’re deluding ourselves. Alcohol is incredibly destructive for those of us who don’t know how to control it.
    The hardest thing for me is that I genuinely enjoy a drink. How do we get past that? Not doing something that brings you great pleasure is a tough ask for anyone. Moderation is not possible (if you’re like me) So, if it must be all or nothing then surely it must be nothing? Then why does that sound so wrong? Why are we cursed with being incapable of a cheeky couple of drinks with friends that don’t lead to massive consumption long after everybody else has stopped?
    I know there is no other way than to stop, but my brain won’t allow me to make the final decision, it keeps making deadlines in the future. The rational part has been hijacked by booze, and it’s like a squatter I can’t get rid of, and secretly have a very soft spot for.

  • Anonymous

    I am in my late twenties and my relationship with alcohol has kept me achieving anything substantial in life. It has prevented me for finishing school, having a career, getting married, having children. I have ruined relationships and friendships due to binge drinking. I have let down those closest to me. These are all realizations that have occurred in the past year or so. As of today, I really accepted that I have a problem and need to change my life. I function day to day, go to school, go to work, etc. I usually only drink 1 or 2 times a week. But, when I do I can’t stop once I start. If it’s in public, it usually ends with me in a fight with somebody. There is some switch in my brain that occurs after I drink heavily and I become a monster. On the outside I appear to be a bright young attractive woman but on the inside I have a void the size of God that I try to fill endlessly with booze or other non-conducive distractions. I want to be free of these shackles. I want to be happy and learn to love myself again, I want to be free of shame and guilt and brokenness. I want to have healthy loving relationships and to be able to be successful in school/career and to have a family of my own one day. I know what I need to do now but I’m scared for the road ahead. Alcohol has shaped my identity from the time I was 13 until today (age 28). I’ve never lived as an adult without drinking. I hope that I’m able to do this, psychologically, that is. I’m not physically dependent. I’m planning on starting aa meetings this week and implementing a “health nut” sort of lifestyle to replace the time that revolved around drinking or planning to drink. I need to feel like a new person. If anyone can offer help, I really need it. Thanks everyone.
    Also, to those that are going through this hard journey, know that you aren’t alone. You will make it through if you just hang on.

  • Friend

    Anonymous: I can completely relate to what you are saying…and the monster switch. Thank you for you statement that I am not alone. We are all working this thing together. Don’t be afraid of the road ahead as a sober person. The road ahead that is wet with booze is truly more frightening. Thanks again for your post and be strong.

  • richard

    Started drinking heavily at age 19 with a fake ID I purchased. I am now 36 and what you would call a weekend binge drinker. I can stay stone cold sober but come Friday, I tear it up. I realize while in this state, I always tell the SAME old stories, same old boring jokes and yet repeat the same ole philisophical yarns as well.

    I want it to end. Contacted a local AA rep today and am waiting to hear back from them. It is getting old deciding how much “beer money” I will need when pay day arrives. No way to live and I am seeking help. Just wanted to share.

  • Patrick

    @ Richard – God bless and good luck to you. I think you will make it just fine. Stay humble and learn everything you can about recovery.

  • J9

    I’m dating a person that’s an alcoholic. I’m not an alcoholic and don’t fully understand what it is to be one. I have grown up around alcoholics and never went that route. I just want to know how to be more supportive. I don’t drink often and wouldn’t mind leaving it at the way side. I just don’t know how to fully be supportive having not been there before.

  • jc

    Sometimes we can’t blame the alcohol for not being a success at school or work or whatever. You’d be surprise how many successful people drank when things were good and when they were bad. What I am learning in sobriety is the problem wasn’t alcohol. Many emotional, mental issues will come up once you stop drinking. Alcohol is but a symptom of something else. Maybe a painful past, or some people just have the genetics. Try AA meetings, there are lots of young people AA meetings too, it’s a support group that is free of cost, and will work if you work it! We are not a glum lot, lots of laughing is heard at meetings too.

  • stw

    I am grateful for the comments made here, i am an alcoholic, i have been since my teens (43 now) and have been sober only 6months during that time. like everyone else, i go through the horrors that you all do, i am the same as many, the downs, not os many ups, i like to drink, but also hate it as well. i want to quit, i just find it so hard, at least im thinking about it, and im confident it will happen one day. thank you for you words, its good to know you are all going through what i am as well. best of luck to you all
    Are there any online support groups as well i can try?

  • Patrick

    @ Stw – check out the forums here:

  • Eddie

    my name is eddie and im 30 years old i wana quit drinking i been drinking for 7 months now is quitting can be easy or harder ???? i need help

  • Day One All Over Again

    I have have Stopped for 26 days this time. I had a 3 day bender after 62 days. I have many more sober day this year than the previous 5. I am tired of starting over again once again at day one. I have more white chips than I care to count. Now is the the time

  • Art

    I feel for all you people out there thinking and knowing we have a drinking problem and how it scares the hell out of us when we think quitting.
    I am 41yrs. old and I have been drinking since I was in my early teens. I contribute my divorce to my drinking 10yrs. ago. I come from a traditional Italian family and we are all very close. My dad died when I was going through my divorce and that really affected me. I have a beautiful wife now and we have 4 children 2 from my previous, 1 from hers and now our own new little boy. I have talked with her about wanting to quit(for me,her and our children).My biggest problem is I have a great job and I do alot of traveling and I’m a supervisor wich doesn’t give me the opprotunty to have the time to go to counceling. If I quit my job it will be devistating to our home life as far as the finances. I think about the drinking and its just so easy to do! I mean if there is beer in the fridge I’m gonna drink it until its gone. My wife drinks too but knowhere as much or like I do. We have a great relationship and she’s the coolest woman in the world. I just feel like some day she’s gonna be like”this is getting old”…I want to stop before it gets to that and I also feel I’m doing an injustice to her,our kids and our life as husband and wife.
    I’m thinking of starting to ween myself down from 12-16 beers a night too 12 for a few days then try and 10 then 8 so on and so forth. Any suggestions would be much appreciated! thank you for reading this and god bless you all!!!

  • Chris

    Day one all over, I completely understand. I have so many I could play cheap poker all nighT but I think the important thing is to not give up. I’m not.

  • Matt

    I never really drank in high school or as an adolescent. When I first joined the military I was stationed in Germany, and this is when my binge drinking began. My friends and I would go out several times a week and binge drink. This pattern of drinking would eventually resurface in my life. When I initially began drinking it was only to have fun. I was relatively active, and enjoyed activities outside of drinking. After two years of binge drinking I left Germany and returned back to the United States. Once I was back in California I had an occasional drink; however, I never binged on alcohol for many years. I would go out with friends occasionally and drink, but I never really had any issues. I was married for 7 hellish years, and I never drank during my marriage. My drinking problem really began during and after my divorce. After my divorce I began drinking again because I was single and hanging out with a younger crowd. Once I started to binge drink again, like I had in the past, I would never stop. What seemed like fun became a clutch to hide all of the pain I felt inside from my marriage. I never drink every day, and I would definitely fall into the binge drinker class. In the last four years that longest I have every gone without binge drinking is 1 month. I think this helped feed the delusion that I didn’t have a problem. Today, I woke up with a splitting headache, and I realized that I no longer want to live like this. Currently, I do no drink to deal with any issues. However, I drink because it has become a pattern in my life. I “reward” myself with a drink after accomplishing something, and it always ends up with the same results. I tell myself that I can just have one or two, and I end up binging on alcohol once again. This pattern has repeated itself over the last 6 years so many times, and I can no longer live like this. Reading all of you responses helped me to realize that as humans many of us suffer with this condition. I think that I came upon this website today for a reason, and I know that no matter what you are going through you are ultimately in control of how you choose to react in any given moment. The past and future do not exist; they only exist in our minds. You may not be able to control every event that happens in your live, but you can control how you react to it. I quit today!

  • amamat ajmal

    hey i really want to quit drinking, i dont have that willpower , please any body help me in quitting drinking and tell me which medicine should i take



  • the one

    this is for art

  • the one

    Art you talked about starting at 12 beers then going to 10 then to 8, I think that is a great idea and it will work for you if you have will power. It can be done. By the way my birthday is june 24th :). Good luck and may god bless you with an alcohol free life.

  • Ryan

    One thing that turns me off from a lot of programs like AA is that they are all centered around religion. You have to say prayers, and “trust in god” to keep you sober. I am not a religious person. I look at religion logically and see what it ultimately is, a coping mechanism. I should be able to get support/assistance without having other people’s religious views forced on me. There are many other ways to cope with issues such as this without bringing religion in to the picture.

  • MattA

    I’m a binge drinker. I get way too drunk then do and say very stupid things that hurt people and give me a great sense of remorse. I’m tired of living this way. I often drink one or two or even three without any ill effects other than a slurred word here or there. But then I find myself on my forth or fifth and don’t want to quit. It’s a problem. I’m staying away from alcohol these days. I read the big book and relate to the stories. I was raised Christian but don’t find the spiritual truth in that religion anymore but for some reason I don’t seem to mind the “God” references in Alcoholics Anonymous anymore. I need a higher power and I believe there are higher powers than me. I don’t have names for them but I know they exist. Until I find the names, “God” will suffice. One day at a time.

  • John

    aa is not centered around religion. It is centered around spitituality and I truly believe I can not be sober unless I do believe in some sort of higher power. I cannot do it myself but I can with the help of God. The truth is you cant analyze it or argue with it, just believe and it will happen. AA is the only thing that has really worked for me at all. For the first time in my life I can not drink every night. Im not saying I’ve been perfect but I’m better than I was. AA is about changing who you are and the other changes will follow.

  • mtororo

    i am trying to quit drinking but i am finding it very hard beacuse each i attend a function and there is free liquor i just cannot resisit but to drink.



  • RayReis

    Forget drinking, these guys had better learn to spell!!!

  • Anonymous

    I binge drink coz of my anxiety i wish i never i feel so along and lost in this world :(

  • John

    I think some people cannot spell,drink I don,t see god as the way but each to there own,time is a great healer,best of luck to you all