Most people who are alcoholic and trapped in a cycle of addiction do not even know how to approach this question. They feel trapped by drinking and they do not see a way out. To get sober is a fate worse than death to them. Sobriety is not a viable alternative. The idea of facing life sober is just too miserable. So how can they quit drinking if they cannot picture a life of sobriety? How can we achieve something if we cannot even picture our goal in our minds?
If we cannot see ourselves being sober and happy, then how do we ever get there?
The answer is that recovery transforms us. Being sober for several days in a row will change our personality, if we allow it to. Of course we have to get active in recovery and start building this new life for ourselves as well.
You are broken down to a point of surrender and you make the decision to stop drinking. That is the first step.
Then you ask for help.
And then, you follow through on it.
That is the process in a nutshell. Now we can compare this to the steps in the 12 step fellowship if you want, but that is actually introducing a whole lot more complexity actually.
Really if you just break down, ask for help, and then do what you are told, you will get better.
The thing of it is that in order to quit drinking successfully you have to let go for a minute. You have to let go of the need to control things. And this is so hard for the average alcoholic to do. They are so used to trying to control their life and their drinking and everything around them. It is a really big deal to finally let go and allow ourselves to simply exist for a while, and listen to the direction of others. To actually slow down and listen and take some suggestions. This is hard to do. Alcoholics resist it. We do not want to do it. Hard headed if you will.
There are various programs out there that intend to help alcoholics and addicts. The most popular one is 12 step based. The others offer alternatives to this and most people will never come into contact with them.
The success rates are the same across all of the programs. No single program has a significant edge over the others. In other words, it is not the program itself that saves the alcoholic and helps them to find recovery, but instead it is the process of recovery itself that is the solution.
Think about that very carefully, as it will show you the real truth of why most people do not stay sober in recovery, yet some are successful. And, it illustrates why some are successful using different programs of recovery.
It is the process that is important. Not the details. Not the steps. Not the support system. It is the process of rebuilding a life that creates long term sobriety. That is how you can quit drinking and find a new way to live. Not through a program necessarily. But through creating a new life for yourself. The program just points the way to do this.