Comments on: How does the Recovering Addict or Alcoholic Generate Healthy Self Esteem? http://www.spiritualriver.com/addiction-help-how-does-the-recovering-addict-or-alcoholic-generate-healthy-self-esteem/ Non-traditional recovery from addiction Thu, 09 Feb 2012 11:09:53 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Brendanhttp://www.spiritualriver.com/addiction-help-how-does-the-recovering-addict-or-alcoholic-generate-healthy-self-esteem/comment-page-1/#comment-48032 Brendan Tue, 01 Dec 2009 16:31:06 +0000 http://www.spiritualriver.com/?p=2460#comment-48032 My biggest problem in early recovery was my external desire to start a relationship. That is one of the worse in my experience with addicts. I would validate myself through the women I was with or how many I could sleep with. I think thats why taking the first year to 100% to focus on your recovery is important because that is the time you work through all of your reservations through the first 3 steps and your sponsor. Once I did that I ws able to get through ANYTHING clean including rejection, breakups, lost jobs, etc. To me all the other external stuff you mentioned like school,health,job is really internal. that is all part of taking personal responsibility in your life so you can be happier with who you are. My biggest problem in early recovery was my external desire to start a relationship. That is one of the worse in my experience with addicts. I would validate myself through the women I was with or how many I could sleep with. I think thats why taking the first year to 100% to focus on your recovery is important because that is the time you work through all of your reservations through the first 3 steps and your sponsor. Once I did that I ws able to get through ANYTHING clean including rejection, breakups, lost jobs, etc. To me all the other external stuff you mentioned like school,health,job is really internal. that is all part of taking personal responsibility in your life so you can be happier with who you are.

]]> By: Patrickhttp://www.spiritualriver.com/addiction-help-how-does-the-recovering-addict-or-alcoholic-generate-healthy-self-esteem/comment-page-1/#comment-44531 Patrick Fri, 16 Oct 2009 00:08:04 +0000 http://www.spiritualriver.com/?p=2460#comment-44531 @ Robin - I completely relate to your inability to internalize your accomplishments. And, I did this with math/academic studies as well. It is like I had no confidence in my ability to learn new things. I think this has become better over time though, and I have a bit more self esteem and confidence in myself these days. All through action. @ Brett - I think you said it better than I did. You took action and even your failures helped to build your new life. You kept taking action. Awesome. @ Keith - I agree completely. Sounds like you found self esteem through taking action in the steps. I know many others who have done the same. Glad to hear you are doing well, and great to "see" you again! @ Robin – I completely relate to your inability to internalize your accomplishments. And, I did this with math/academic studies as well. It is like I had no confidence in my ability to learn new things. I think this has become better over time though, and I have a bit more self esteem and confidence in myself these days. All through action.

@ Brett – I think you said it better than I did. You took action and even your failures helped to build your new life. You kept taking action. Awesome.

@ Keith – I agree completely. Sounds like you found self esteem through taking action in the steps. I know many others who have done the same. Glad to hear you are doing well, and great to “see” you again!

]]> By: Keith Brayhttp://www.spiritualriver.com/addiction-help-how-does-the-recovering-addict-or-alcoholic-generate-healthy-self-esteem/comment-page-1/#comment-44513 Keith Bray Thu, 15 Oct 2009 20:46:23 +0000 http://www.spiritualriver.com/?p=2460#comment-44513 Self esteem for me, is an inside feeling caused by action. Affirmations are a scorecard. In the beginning I had a number of "I am..." statements provided to me by people who loved and cared for me. I did not believe them. As I took "holistic" action, including the steps, I slowly came to appreciate the imperfect beauty that was me and saw in me what others had. I had a ton of support from friens and outside professionals to help me. When I had put together many days away from my primary addictions and gone past Step 5, I began to like the "real" me! Keep up the good work Patrick! luv Keith Self esteem for me, is an inside feeling caused by action. Affirmations are a scorecard. In the beginning I had a number of “I am…” statements provided to me by people who loved and cared for me. I did not believe them.
As I took “holistic” action, including the steps, I slowly came to appreciate the imperfect beauty that was me and saw in me what others had.
I had a ton of support from friens and outside professionals to help me. When I had put together many days away from my primary addictions and gone past Step 5, I began to like the “real” me!
Keep up the good work Patrick!
luv Keith

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