There are a number of potential complicating factors in recovery.

Why?

Because addiction is complicated.

Many people disagree with the idea that recovery is complex. They believe that recovery is simple. “Just follow this simple program, and you’ll achieve a meaningful life of sobriety,” they say. Or they declare that addiction is very simple and basic, because they “got drunk and high simply because they wanted to.”

I disagree with these ideas. In my opinion, addiction is not simple. It is complicated. Because of this, achieving successful recovery can be complicated as well.

For example:

Relationships can be horribly complicated. Take a look at the mess that most people in early recovery have in terms of their relationships with other people. Just glance through the 12 step program and you’ll see that much of the work involves fixing ourselves so that we can then attempt to mend our broken relationships with others. In addition to this, my direct experience in early recovery is that most of my peers who relapsed did so because of a turbulent relationship with a significant other.

Mental illness can complicate recovery. Which came first, the mental illness or the addiction? It doesn’t matter. You have to treat both of them if you want to have any kind of real shot at maintaining long term sobriety. It doesn’t do much good to be clean and sober if you are clinically depressed or overwhelmed with anxiety all the time. In addition, many people used drugs or alcohol to self medicate their condition, so starting on the road to sobriety is going to necessitate some changes as far as treating their condition.

Physical ailments can complicate recovery. I have personally witnessed this many times with others in recovery–they get sick or get hurt in some way, and this eventually leads them to relapse. Now obviously, falling ill or suffering an injury does not necessitate a relapse, nor does it excuse it. But I have definitely seen it happen. It’s like a snowball effect: first, the person gets sick or injured or even just diagnosed with something. Then they become depressed, and in some cases their illness or injury tends to isolate them. This is how physical ailments can snowball into a full blown relapse. Of course, anyone working a diligent and honest program of recovery could potentially prevent themselves from being pushed over the edge in this way, but the basic threat still exists.

Financial problems can complicate recovery. We all know how overwhelming this can be. The added stress of being heavily in debt or suffering any sort of financial trouble can be enough to push some addicts over the edge.

Action items - what you can do:

1) Avoid getting into a relationship in early recovery. Learn to be happy with yourself first.

2) Strive for balance. I really thought this was useless when I first got clean and sober. Why not focus exclusively on recovery, I reasoned, and there isn’t much balance in that. But a balanced lifestyle becomes more important the longer you stay clean. You have to get out there and start living the principles of recovery into your daily life. A healthy balance becomes critical.

3) Use a holistic approach. In other words, take care of your entire body, mind, and spirit. For example, I used to justify my cigarette smoking by saying “at least I’m not drinking and using hard drugs anymore.” This is a rationalization that keeps people sick. A holistic approach forced me to look at how I was damaging my body anyway with cigarettes, and what the long term implications of that might be.

The holistic approach will also keep other things in check, such as your mental health and well being, your approach to food and nutrition, exercise, meditation, and so on. Being healthy all-around can prevent some of these major issues from becoming potential triggers in your life.

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John MacDougall of Hazelden rightly points out that resentment is no longer the number one offender, as stated in the Big Book of AA, but complacency is.

Why is this, you ask? And how could the big book of AA possibly be wrong? Because the founders of AA who wrote the big book could only use the information they had at the time. In some ways, they had a limited perspective on things. One example of this is their relatively short term sobriety. Because they had not experienced long term sobriety, nor had they watched others in AA fall victim to complacency after long periods of abstinence, it seemed reasonable to them that resentment really was the number one offender. Today we know differently, now that we have seen many recovering alcoholics achieve long term sobriety.

Why resentment ceases to be a threat

It is true that many in AA or other recovery programs will struggle with resentments. They can indeed be the poison that leads people back to drinking or drugs. But anyone who is living a progressive life of recovery will inevitably make a shift in how they handle things. Either they will learn to deal with their anger, or they will not. This is part of the learning process of recovery, and is also addressed specifically in the 12 steps. Regardless of how a recovering alcoholic goes about it, they are going to have to learn to let go of their anger if they are to remain sober in the long run. If they cannot cross this “learning gap” and learn how to overcome their resentments, then they will inevitably drink or use drugs again some day.

Why complacency becomes the dominant threat

For those of us who make it past this initial stage of recovery, and work the steps and start dealing with life “on life’s terms,” resentment ceases to be such a major threat, and we now have a new problem to worry about: complacency. This is the true number one offender, and you can see evidence of this when you hear an alcoholic describe their relapse after a long period of sobriety. It’s not a specific resentment that got them in the end–instead, the person is usually so baffled that they can’t pin down why they drank, and only know that they had “drifted away from AA meetings” or started “letting up on their program of recovery.” In other words, they got complacent.

It’s not the big things that get us in long term sobriety (like a big juicy resentment), but the little things that slowly eat away at us if we happen to stop making spiritual progress.

Action items - What you can do:

1) Fight complacency by challenging yourself to keep growing spiritually. This might include empowering growth activities that fall outside of traditional “spiritual” roles, such as starting a new exercise program or maybe a commitment to volunteer and help out somewhere.

2) Fight complacency by working with other drug addicts and alcoholics. This is one of the most effective tools for defeating complacency in the long run. Helping other alcoholics practically ensures our continual progress. Make it a strong point in your recovery.

Photo by Gastev

Do you think that current recovery options are sufficient? That addicts simply need more dedication in applying these solutions?

Or is it possible that our current “solution set” to the problem of addiction is lacking in some way?

The relapse rate for recovering drug addicts and alcoholics are dismal. They are absolutely terrible. This is found to be universally true, regardless of who is measuring; regardless of which statistics you believe. Relapse rates are very poor within the substance abuse community.

12 step programs dominate the industry. There are other treatment options out there, but they are spread very thin, are often unknown, and do not offer significantly better success rates. Most people in the field of substance abuse argue that addicts are relapsing simply because they “don’t want it badly enough,” not because the recovery program is lacking.

I believe the argument that “addicts just don’t want it enough” is an excuse for a faulty treatment program. In some cases, it might be true. But look at the numbers. So many addicts try and fail, over and over again.

This is not to say that we can help people who have no interest at all in quitting. But so many who did want to stop have tried and failed. This is ridiculous. Unacceptable, even. There has to be a better way.

Recovery is still young

The idea of recovering from drugs and alcohol is still fairly young. Group therapy, 12 step programs, and drug treatment centers are only a few hundred years old. The struggle against alcoholism and addiction has gone on for several thousand years! And, there are people who find relief from addiction through other means, such as counseling, religion, and so on. So the real point I want to make here is this:

Don’t get stuck.

What I mean by that is that sometimes people get stuck, and if they would just open up to a new possibility, it would solve their problem for them. For example, some people get stuck in religion. They are convinced (usually by other people) that religion can save them from addiction, and it is the answer to all of their problems. I actually know people who have been told not to go to AA, because religion is all they should need. Do you see how this could be limiting to someone?

It’s the same for other situations as well: people get stuck in AA just as easily. Perhaps they would really benefit and grow spiritually through a church, but they are held back because they are constantly hearing an anti-religious message at 12 step groups. This is limiting as well. Why is it that so many communities claim to have the ultimate solution?

Fear is the limiting device that holds people back

If someone struggles with addiction, and finally finds a solution that works for them, they will tend to preach about that solution to the exclusion of other possibilities. This is a fairly natural, fear-based response, and the person justifies their argument by claiming that they are genuinely trying to help others. A large part of their “effort” to help others is simply to reassure themselves of their own security in recovery. They are trying to reinforce their safety in sobriety, which is naturally understandable. The only problem with this is that most addicts and alcoholics are not finding success with universal methods (such as a 12 step program). So it doesn’t make a lot of sense to push your own “ultimate solution” on to someone that needs help. Chances are, that person needs a custom designed creative strategy for overcoming their addiction, not a one-size-fits-all program that doesn’t seem to produce a meaningful success rate when applied across the board.

Does this mean AA doesn’t work?

Of course not….AA is working really well for a lot of people, and there is no reason to discard the program entirely. But it is only one option, and it has become obvious to some that it does not universally work for everyone. It makes sense to expand treatment options beyond just the 12 step program.

AA works for some, and it is still my number one recommendation to the newcomer, because of the concentrated amount of support offered there. But we must expand the solution set if we are to be genuinely helpful to others.

The creative theory of recovery

The creative theory of recovery is a work in progress, and I’m still attempting to define it myself. Here’s what the creative theory of recovery looks like so far:

1) It is wide, and can encompass 12 step programs, as well as those who find recovery through church, religion, religious communities, or group therapy.

2) It is a proactive solution, in that it entails much more than mere abstinence from chemicals. Something with passion must replace addiction in the user’s life.

3) It is holistic and necessarily complicated, because addiction is complex and affects so many aspects of a person’s life.

Action items - what you can do

1) Stay open to the creative process in your life. Be mindful of what actions you take that help you in recovery.

2) Explore what works for others in recovery. Go beyond their current “solution.” Ask them what really helps them stay clean and sober beyond their canned “solution speech.”

We all know what addiction is. But what exactly is recovery? How do we define it?

Recovery is….

An ongoing journey, one that is exciting and keeps you interested in living life. The shift that occurs in recovery will literally change your personality. Life becomes interesting and exciting again. We start to anticipate future events with enthusiasm again. We are no longer simply existing to use drugs.

An experiment in building healthy relationships. Recovery is all about relationships. No man is an island. We need help to recover and we end up helping others. This is the great journey, the great revelation–that we can recover together. Old relationships are restored.

Not the drag that you think it will be when you are still using drugs and alcohol. Before we get sober, most us believe we will never have fun again. The reality is that our idea of fun changes as we stay clean and sober. Our priorities shift.

Not having to lie anymore. This is true freedom. Your mind is relieved from the obsession of figuring out how to maintain a dual existence and put up a front to certain people. When we are actively using drugs and alcohol, we don’t realize how much energy this takes away from us.

Recovery is….

A commitment to progress. In active addiction, we are just coasting along, using one drug after another, and basically chasing the same high over and over again. We don’t stop to consider goals, aspirations, or great things we’d like to accomplish. Recovery changes all that and gives us purpose.

Spiritual. It is replacing the obsession of self-medicating with a connection with a higher power and a meaningful life.

A series of goals. The day-at-a-time philosophy of twelve step programs encourages us to make a daily goal of maintaining sobriety for that day. The success that comes with living this philosophy builds on itself and teaches us discipline and perseverance.

More than anything, though, I think recovery is the ability to create a new life for yourself.

Action Items: What you can do

1) Give some thought to your goals. Live mindfully. Make sure you are making progress in your life and not simply coasting along. Remember the zombie-like state we lived in during addiction and strive to live more purposefully than that.

2) Grow spiritually. Ask yourself: “What can I do today to connect with my higher power?”

3) Stay grateful. Remember how much your life is changed and give yourself credit for it. Appreciate how far you’ve come in recovery. If you’re clean and sober today, you’re a miracle!